(Closed) Bummed…best friend can’t make our wedding.

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
13251 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I know how you feel.  When my wedding rolls around, my best friend will be abroad and barred by her grant from leaving the country to come back while her school semester is going on.  It really sucks, but you seem to understand that it’s not you, it’s really just financial/school issues coming up. 

You have a great friend for him being so up front about it right away!

Post # 4
425 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Oh that’s so upsetting! I am so sorry he can’t make it.

Many of our best friends cannot come :(. Our best “couple friend” that we spend SO much time with already commited to another wedding on the same day! (The wife is part of the bridal party of the other wedding)

One of my 3 rommates from college can’t come she’s also in the bridal party of this other wedding :(. 

Also, my very close friend from middle school/college rommate/rommate after college and her fiance, whom we hve spent so much time and even traveled with internationally, are living overseas and can’t come.

So, that’s 5 of our very, very closest friends.

We are trying to focus on the people who can make it- my high school friends, my fiance’s friends from college. But it’s still a bit upsetting. 

Post # 5
2493 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

First of all, I am so glad you are taking this in stride. I know that it really sucks that he can’t come, but I was half expecting one of those “but he should make it anyway” posts.

In the end, I think everybody on here knows how you feel. There is always a few people you really want to come who cannot and it hurts not to share your day. For my grandfather and great aunt who are unable to travel, I am getting a family friend to video the ceremony and Fiance and I are putting together a nice photo book for them, sort of as a “here but not here” way of having them participate in our big day.

Maybe you two can plan a “catch up” vacation once he is out of school and back on his feet to celebrate all of the milestones that you haven’t seen each other for in a few years.

Post # 7
425 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@keepsmiling19:  It’s tough. I know there will be others who tell us in teh coming months they can’t come either. We are both in international affairs (currently live overseas) and a lot of our friends are too, so many will be out of the country I’m sure. 

I did not handle it well when I found out about this other wedding that was happening on the same day as ours. It was a couple I went to school with but wasn’t close to, though several of my close friends were.

My friend who is in the bridal party is extremely rational and this is what she said:

I’m bummed I won’t be at your wedding. However, you realize pretty quickly that the wedding is a very special day, but that it’s really the first of many wonderful days of your marriage. So we will absolutely miss you on your wedding day and will make sure to visit you after you’re happily married.”

I try to keep that in mind. 🙂

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