(Closed) Busy BM dilemma

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1763 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I think they should scheudle it for the weekend she is availble if everyone else can. If no then schedule it and she will miss out. I don’t think it’s that big of a deal as long as she comes to one of your events. I won’t be expecting my Bridesmaid or Best Man to come to more than one event be it a shower or bachelorette party.

Post # 4
Member
1078 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

I think since this BM’s schedule is the tightest of all, maybe they should just move forward with plans – if she can make it then great, if not then she’ll definitely be missed.

Having 5 out of 6 of them there for the smaller events (showers, bachelorette party) isn’t bad at all! As long as she is still committed to being a bridesmaid in the actual wedding.

Post # 5
Member
7152 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I say try to schedule it on her oone available day…if that doesn’t work for everyone, then schedule and it and if she misses it, so be it.

Post # 7
Member
2214 posts
Buzzing bee

I would just say to try to schedule it so she can make it, and if she can’t then oh well.  I’m actually a “busy BM” for my cousin’s wedding in October, and I can’t go to her bridal shower or bachlorette party, so I’ll just be going to the wedding.  Before accepting Bridesmaid or Best Man, I told her that I probably wouldn’t be able to go to these things (though I am paying my portion of them and sending gifts), and she said fine, so hopefully it doesn’t suddenly bother her when I don’t show up. I live across the country, am in school, and live on a very fixed budget.  Yes, I could probably not go on a spring break to save money to make it to her shower, but while I am completely excited for her and happy to be pitching in for her shower and things, my life doesn’t revolve around her wedding (hopefully that doesn’t come off mean or anything because that’s not my intent).  I would just try to look at it from your BM’s perspective and not as the bride.  Obviously her singing is very important to her, so that’s her number 1 priority.  I would talk to her if you feel like it’s necessary though.

Post # 8
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Well, I don’t think that she just “went and booked most of them (the dates) up”. After all, she is a singer, it’s her livelihood. I don’t think she can help it not working on the weekends just like your other bridesmaids can’t help working weedays.

Post # 9
Member
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Majority rules. Take a vote. Whatever date the majority of you are available, that should be the date for the bachelorette.  For those who can’t make it…oh well.  If you keep trying to please everyone, y’all will just keep bouncing dates around and nothing will get done.

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