Post # 1
I was just reading another post on the boards and it got me thinking….the question is, do you think it’s better to have a baby while you have purchased your own home (morgaged etc.) OR to have a baby while your still renting??
NOW WAIT…think about it…I get that most of you will probably say having your own home like it’s a no brainer…..but really if you think about it, what is all that great about it?
There seems to be so much negativity (I find) if a couple is having a baby and rent an apartment…but if they own a home it’s like it’s now acceptable to have a child….even if the people who own the home are in a lot of debt on top of their mortgage and the people who are renting have no debt at all…. I know a couple who owns their own home and is making payments just fine RIGHT NOW but if they were to have a baby it would put them in panic mode financially….and then I know a couple who are renting and have much more money saved up because it’s not all being sucked into a huge mortgage and now they are ready to buy and their daughter is 2….so now they know how much everythings going to cost and can work their choice of home around that…..
What are your thoughts?? All opinions welcome 🙂
Post # 3
I always used to say that 100% I would own a home before having a baby. But it’s just not going to happen in that order for us. That’s not b/c we’re not financially secure — it has more to do with the fact that we’re not currently living in the same area of the country where we will ultimately settle down due to job stuff. In my dream world we would both have (1) stable jobs and (2) a home that we own before having a baby, but life doesn’t always turn out exactly how you imagine it.
Post # 4
hmmm… i dont think its a number one priority…. but its definately important to me. i already own a home and we are comfortable with our mortgage (but decided to wait a year or two to have kids to pay down some student loans and cc debt). its a personal choice. i know plenty of people who have raised their children in apts and they turned out fine…. really its such a personal choice- (its helps that our mortgage is less than we used to pay for rent ;))
Post # 5
My partner and I will continue to rent whilst having a family. The plan is to save $10K, put it in the bank and when ALL the kids are in school and I am back at work, then we can get a mortgage and use the money we invested as a deposit.
I am from Australia and we have some of the worlds most expensive real estate. Its bananas how expensive it is and many people are starting to struggle and with high interest rates (high compared the UK or America), expensive utilities and food that has shot up 20% (!!!) in just a year… I have no idea how we would do it on one income. I also refuse to put my kids into childcare… I have nothing against parents who do, its a very personal decision to make, but its one that is not for me or my partner.
If we got a mortgage now the sums say I would be around 33-35 by the time they are low enough to be comfortable on one income and live without government support and that is too old for me to be starting a family. I am 24 this year, kids are planned for when I am 26.
You never know, none of this may happen and we might end up doing everything differently… but its nice to have a plan, lol
Post # 6
I think like you pointed out in the original post, it all depends on the situation. If you’re not planning to stay in the same area past a few years, would be better off financially to keep renting rather than buying, etc. then of course it makes sense to do that.
In our case, we had money saved up, no debt, and had moved to the city where we plan to raise our children, so it made sense for us to buy a house right away and start building up equity rather than continue to pay rent. I don’t think for a minute though that that’s the “right” way, it was just what worked best for us.
Post # 7
We had our baby while we were renting a house and still are living in the same house. We just haven’t found anything that we have fell in love with so we are most likely going to be building our dream home. I don’t think it matters if you rent before you have a baby, usually everyone who has a baby intends on owning their own house anyways. No biggie.
Post # 8
It depends on the situation. Some people are just stupid with money and buy more than they can afford and are underwater, but it’s like, we have a house! We can have a baby! NO dodo brain. Not smart.
Whatever is financially better for your family is the best way to have a child. We have a house because I bought it last year. I paid outright, but if I didn’t have the money to outright pay for it, I would have continued to rent until we could save up money for the down payment that one of us could afford on our on. A house is good, but if you can’t affordit and are doing it just because everyone’s doing it, you’ll mess yourself up.
Post # 9
I think it’s different for different people. For me, I just felt more comfortable not only owning my home, but owning the home I want to raise my child in when I have her. Of course if we couldn’t afford that we wouldn’t have done it.
Post # 9
I think the real issue is whether or not you are financially stable enough to own and house AND have a baby, not where you literally live. Some pp’s have brought up the point that they “could” live in a house but aren’t for various reasons. As long as you “could” have both house and baby if you wanted, it’s fine to rent if it works better for wanting to move soon, looking for the perfect place, etc.
So to me the more important question isn’t whether to buy a home before or after baby, but “whether you think it’s important to wait to have baby until financially stable enough to buy a home too?”
Post # 10
We owned a home in Upstate NY, relocated from Boston and decided that we were actually city people and there was no way we’d be happy living in the country, sold the house and moved back to renting in the city.
We’d love to own a home here but haven’t found anything we love just yet and since we’re expecting in December are in no rush to find a place, rush to close on it, rush to move in – all while preparing to deliver. No thanks! 🙂
If it happens, fantastic. But I’ve seen both sides and I’m much happier renting, making a living and living where I am.
Post # 11
It’s silly that people look down upon renters having babies!!
My view is that if you can save enough to put down on a house/condo (so that you are not mortgaged up the wazoo) then it makes sense for you to buy (of course if you find the right place). We purchased a condo before our wedding and have been there for two years and have enough space for a baby.
We saved enough so that our mortgage is actually less than what our rent would be (in Boston). Adding a baby to the mix won’t put any more financial strain on us than if we were renting.
Post # 12
It really depends. For us, our rent payment and mortgage payment was a difference of $75 a month. In this area, renting is just as expensive (sometimes more) than owning a home. And personally, owning a home was important to us. We love having a yard, neighborhood, etc. and if we continued renting we couldnt have all that.
Post # 13
I don’t really get what the big deal is about owning a home before having a child. As long as you have a stable/steady roof over your head, go forth and multiply! 🙂
Post # 14
personally, i don’t think it needs to be a huge priority. my husband and i bought our first home last march, got pregnant in november, and are expecting our first baby this august. it might seem like that was super intentional, but it really just worked out that way.
the pros of owning a home first is that if you plan to own, you can get a better sense of your financial situation before baby arrives. you can save for a down payment and other moving expenses and get used to all of the hidden costs of owning a home (believe me, there are many!). i imagine that once you have a baby, your financial priorities are pretty much focused on baby’s needs for a little while at least. also, you have more freedom to make as much noise as you need to (i.e. baby crying) and may have more space for storage and baby stuff. but thats where it pretty much ends for me.
the cons are that clearly these days owning a home is not the key to stability and success that it might have once been. if you end up with a bad mortgage loan or a home you can’t really afford, of course it’s better to not have that burden. plus, all the costs of owning a home won’t disappear when baby comes, so your budget may be stretched thinner than you expected. plus, owning a home is a huge committment, so if you’re not planning to stay in the same place for a long time, relocating with a baby is probably a bit harder (but not impossible). i can definitely see the benefits of renting when you have a baby and sometimes wish we didn’t have the huge responsibility of owning a house with a baby on the way.
Post # 15
Personally – owning a home before expanding our family is important to us. We want to be settled, have extra space, have a yard, have a neighborhood with real neighbors (since “neighbors” in apartments are any but, in my experiences).
Everyone has different priorities and plans though so what is important to one couple may not be to another and there is nothing wrong with that.
Also, when Darling Husband and I buy a home in the near future, our mortgage+taxes+insurance will be less than what we currently pay in rent (so I’d say that would make us more financially secure than we are currently renting).