Post # 1
Back in July my friend tried on and bought her wedding dress. For fun, she had 3 of her bridesmaids there and had us try on bridesmaid dresses. She planned for December 1 for us to have our fitting and buy the dress. I couldn’t make it December 1 and she told me I have until Christmas to get fitted and buy my dress. Only problem is I’m a few months pregnant with my second child. I’m already wider, and sort of showing. I told her this and asked her if I could wait until summer after I have the baby so I have a better idea of size I’ll be and she told me no the lady at the store will yell if I don’t get it done by Christmas. She’s not getting married until October 2020. Apparently, they’ll measure me now and order three sizes bigger. Then I can just get alterations for the size I am. If it’s like my first pregnancy I shrunk down to smaller than I was before I got pregnant and I don’t want to pay an arm and a leg for alterations. But I also don’t want the dress to be too small. That’s why I asked if I could wait. Is it rude if I have to pay a couple hundred in alterations (which the lady said could happen if I shrink down) I back out? The dress is already $275 and then with alterations it could be a lot. What do I do? I’ve been so stressed.
Another issue is my son is her ring bearer but he’s not invited to the reception. The wedding is an hour and a half away and she expects my parents or my husbands to drive out there to pick him up. So that’s another thing I’m stressed about because I’m not going to make my parents drive all the way there to pick him up. Especially when they’ll already have our young child already.
Again she’s not getting married until October 2020 😭
Post # 2
Drop out. Seriously, there is no need to get the dresses for 2020 now, I am a 2020 bride too and I think that is insane. I haven’t even looked at my own dress and she is planning the bridesmaids fitting… crazy
I already commented on the ring bearer post. I wouldn’t put up with it. You can be politically correct and tell her that with the new baby on the way there is no way you can plan that far off into the future and it’s best she gets another bridesmaid
Post # 3
Wow that is unreasonable all around. Buying a dress 2 years out for a bridesmaid is ridiculous in your situation. You’re pregnant, your body will change dramatically so expecting you to buy a dress 3 sizes too big and just pay hundreds and alterations is not reasonable and I do not think you should do that. And I’m sorry but it sounds like she’s just using your son as a prop for photos photos, an hour and a half away it’s a long way to drive to just have your son there for half an hour. I would definitely say no to that. I hope it all works out for you.
Post # 4
I agree with others, you’re going to have to put your foot down. $275 plus alterations is way too much for a bridesmaid dress (heck, I’m spending less on my wedding dress). I agree you should be honest about the money situation(kids are expensive after all), and say you’re going to have to drop out. And definitely talk to her about making an exception for your kid for the reception, or you’re not attending. She’s being selfish.
Post # 5
This is a ridiculous situation Bee – she is asking way too much of you and being WHOLLY inconsiderate – not to even mention how mental she is doing everything two years in advance..
drop out and give yourself some peace a) while you’re pregnant and have a new born baby next year and b) peace from the bridezilla madness so you remain friends and you can actually still enjoy her wedding when it comes around..
Tou have very valid and logical reasons for asking for concessions, accommodations, and general common sense and understanding from your friend. If she wants your for her bridesmaid for a reason that is..
Post # 6
Either drop out or put your foot down. She isn’t getting married until Oct 2020, there isn’t even sense to buy a dress right now. Yes it does take a while to order and have it come in but I think next summer is perfectly acceptable to buy. Or unless she is paying for your alteration then that’s a different story.
Post # 7
I do not understand why brides do this! 2 years out is a lot of time for people to gain or lose weight! Sometimes that happens even if the person isn’t trying – medications, pregnancy, etc. That bride is going to be pretty stressed when everyone starts texting her a month before that their dress doesn’t fit. I suggest having a serious conversation with her that bridesmaid dress shopping is supposed to occur 6 months before the wedding so that everyone’s dresses should fit properly. Also explain to her that styles change so she might not even like what she picked by 2020.
Post # 8
Given how ridiculous this woman is about her wedding vs your needs already, it’s possible that you won’t even be friends with her in 2020. I’d step down now.
Post # 9
Well she sounds ridiculous. Pretty much everyone told me you need to buy bridesmaid dresses about 6 months out. Is she ordering from David’s Bridal because I could understand why she may want you to get it now. I think everyone a little on edge on what will happen with them. But even then weight fluctuates and life happens I would never buy anything 2 years out. I think if your going to have kids in your wedding then they can go to the reception. I new someone who through a fit because there flower girl had to be at the reception. I just think it’s unacceptable either allow them at the reception or cut them from your wedding. This is probably just the beginning of crazy demands I think I would tell her I can’t be in the wedding.