By the age of 30

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 17
Member
7311 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

Turning 30 was awesome. It did spur me to do some things on my bucket list like getting the tattoo I’d been dreaming of, jumping out of a perfectly good airplane, and going to my first pro football game (all things I would HIGHLY recommend, btw). Mr. LK and I were dating at that point, but I definitely didn’t equate my age with any milestones in our relationship. Age is what you make of it, and I chose to make it awesome. 🙂 

Post # 18
Member
1447 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I had this.  On some level you will never know what life will bring you, but it doesn’t hurt to have goals and a general plan of what you want mapped out.

I broke up with someone shortly before I turned 29 because he wasn’t ever going to propose – I told him I wanted to have two children before I turned 35 and in order to do that and still have time to enjoy married life, etc., I would need to get engaged before turning 30.  He said that he wasn’t down with that.  Shortly after the breakup, Fiance and I started dating, and we got engaged a few months before I turned 30.

Not every story is like mine, but I do think around 30 you realize that life is extremely short, and we’ll only get to do a small bit of what we want to do with it.  It’s too short to be mopey about being single, or waste with the wrong person.

Post # 19
Member
3194 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@mscuppycake:  not in regards to marriage (i’m 25 and getting married in october, so i might feel differently if i was closer to 30), but Fiance and i do have plans to try and make it to all 7 continents by the time we’re 30. i think for us 30 is the year we have given ourselves as a deadline to start TTC, so we’re trying to get in all our ‘selfish’ time by then.

also, 30 is biologically the year women start to lose their fertility at a more significant rate, so that’s likely why a lot of women feel the heat to get things done by then.

Post # 20
Member
2129 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

@mscuppycake:  I’m over 30 now, buying a house before 30 was one of my goals that I accomplished. I never cared if I got married or not so that wasn’t one of my” before 30 goals.” In my 20’s I wanted a child but not until I was at least 35.

Post # 21
Member
486 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I feel like I don’t really fit in with PP, but I hope to gain some independence by the time I’m 30. I’m 24 now and in grad school, being fully supported by my parents. By the time I graduate I’ll be 27. So I’m hoping that by the time I’m 30 I have a job, can support myself, and live with my future husband (hopefully my current SO lol). 

Post # 22
Member
78 posts
Worker bee

I think with many women without kids, its their biological clock ticking. These same women do not want kids out of wedlock for whatever reason which is why they might be itching for a proposal.

It also goes back to the myth that its more difficult for women over 30 to find a man and get married. So some women start panicking when they get closer to that age and no ring yet.

It also has to do with just wanting to move forward in life. Most people by 30 have got their lives together and feel ready for marriage.

Post # 23
Member
854 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m 34 and on going on my second marriage (3rd engagement) and 30 never meant much to me in terms of marriage or bust.  I wonder if its because where I’m from (SF Bay Area) most of my peers didn’t marry and start families until after 30 (many after 35).  Careers, advanced education and the insane cost of living could have been factors. 

I’m always starting over in life: carreer, where I live, financial situation etc so I’ve never beent he “settled” type. I guess its not in the books for me no matter how I try to fit in. 

 

For me I don’t consider 30 “old” or over the hill by any means.

 

 

 

Post # 24
Member
1332 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I felt this way very much.  I got engaged about a month and a half before my 31st birthday and we will be married in 2 months when I am 32.  It was important to me because I want to have a family and I know the longer I wait and the older I get it becomes a little more difficult.  But, the next step is to buy a house and that will be nice.

Post # 25
Member
2980 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I wanted to be married by 30. I got engaged on my 28th birthday. Other than that, no big life goals. I’m 30 now, and I am starting to hear the biological clock very quietly ticking in the background, but kids are a take it or leave it thing for me, currently.

Post # 26
Member
526 posts
Busy bee

@mscuppycake:  this is kind of funny because it did bother me a little that I am a few months older than Darling Husband, so I made sure that we picked a wedding date where both of our ages appeared the same (both 29), not me 30 him 29 on the marriage certificate.  weird, i know. 

Post # 27
Member
5013 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2018

I want to have two kids between 25 and 30. I’m 20 now, so I’m not in a hurry. My biological clock has been ticking down to my 25th birthday since I was 15-16. 

I’d like to own a home before any of my future kids are 4, so around 29-31. Hopefully sooner.

Post # 28
Member
1459 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - Bristol zoo

I’ve always said that if I have kids I’d like the first one before I’m 30,so obviously I hope to have been married for a while by then as well. Not sure why, I guess I always saw it as the year you really become middle-aged or something. But things are so different now… 

Mum also had me at 32 andI’ve always set my standards by her (which is why I used to be so hopeful of being married at 22,obviously that isn’t going to work out lol) 

Post # 29
Member
3564 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I’m 29.  For some reason, I always said I wanted to be pregnant when I’m 30.  Which for me, meant I needed to get married before that. It just seemed like a good age for me to start a family.  I wanted to be able to live freely and selfishly in my 20s.  I also didn’t want to wait to late because of the risks of complications.  

We are getting married this September and plan to TTC soon after.  I will be 30 in January, and Fiance will be 30 in April.  Fingers crossed that I get to be 30 and preggo! 🙂

Post # 30
Member
169 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@mscuppycake:  While in college, I thought I would be married and making babies by the time I was 27 – you know, go to school, get an education, land the dream job, find the dream man, and live happily ever after, right?  

Well, life has a way of throwing curves.  But I believe everything works out for the best!  I turned 30 in April and here I am, engaged for the first time.  (No kids, either!)  It’s funny – some of my best girlfriends are getting married this year, too.  

Please don’t be in a rush to get married!!  Get settled in your job/career first – figure out what you want to do and learn how to take care of yourself.  Then, you can worry about someone else.  We plan to have kids within 2 years, but I am happy I have waited a bit because we will be financially stable and able to raise kids!

I couldn’t imagine being pregnant and living with my new hubby in my parent’s basement – YIKES!  Wait…Wait…Wait!  30 isn’t old, ladies!

Post # 31
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Nope!  I met Darling Husband when I was 28.  I never thought about wanting to be anywhere by age 30.

Now 35, I would like to have a kid by then (next year) for reasons based on medical evidence of fertility/issues.  It’s not going to happen however bc Darling Husband at age 38 does not feel this pressure and thinks we won’t have an issue.

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