Call out a BM's rude behavior?

posted 4 months ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
5137 posts
Bee Keeper

Bin her off as a friend and moved on with your happy married life 

Post # 3
1796 posts
Buzzing bee

I’d ghost her.  If she ever said anything I’d respond that “It’ll come as a surprise to you, but my sister is fluent in French.  So all of those things you thought you were snarking and saying in private about my family were heard and understood.  I’m sticking with family since you showed your true backstabbing colors.”  But I wouldn’t say anything unless she brought it up.

Post # 4
5067 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

sunshadebride :  agree with above… if you chew her out over it, all she’s going to do is lie to your face, roll her eyes and talk about you even more behind your back.  She’s not the type to change her attitude or realize she was in the wrong, or care.  Not a good friend, so just kiss her goodbye without wasting your time.

Post # 6
1579 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Yup, agree with fascinated, just dump her from your life and if she asks about it, tell her the truth. You don’t need people like that in your life, but don’t waste your time trying to confront her about it, it’s behind you and you need to focus on going forward with your life. 

Post # 7
623 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

This behaviour is just so rude, I don’t know where to start. I agree with PPs, it sounds like she is not a positive part of your life. I would end the friendship.

The petty side of me would love to see your sister join in one of their little chats as a surprise and then tell them in French that she had heard all of their nasty conversations and they should feel ashamed for being so horrible!

Post # 8
45656 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

these 2 often chat in French, even when I have been around them, because it’s an easy way to discuss things privately or honestly to talk crap. 

Ineresing that it never bothered you until you found out they were talking crap about you and people close to you.

Post # 10
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

“you showed your true backstabbing colors” made me literal lol. Don’t waste any more time or energy on this.

Post # 11
523 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I would send her a message telling her that your sister speaks French and has told you everything they said on the day of your wedding – and then delete them from your life.  They sound horrible.  I’m so sorry that you didn’t find out their true colours before the wedding.

Post # 12
588 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

The real problem is your sister who just haaaad to tell you this.  You did not need to hear about this, which now put a damper on your wedding memories.

She didn’t save you from anything (the old “she should know!” thing) because you already knew this bridesmaid wasn’t a nice person and your friendship was already on the way out.

People who tattle tale (“Do you know what she said about you!?”) just like being looked at as “the good one” when in actuality she put some bad feelings on your wedding whenever you think about it.

Post # 13
411 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

The thing is, don’t we all have “bad things” to comment on other people’s weddings/events, all behind their backs? Isn’t it part of what this website is for?


I didn’t spend an extra night at my friend’s wedding to save money, I was the MOH, and we’re still vest friends.


I feel like there’s more to this.

Post # 14
96 posts
Worker bee

People like that will always be like that and they don’t deserve to have a friend like you. I don’t think it is worthwhile confronting her, I would just drop her out of her life. People who like to talk behind peoples back will pretty much always do it and you don’t tneed that kind of negativity in your life. Plus when you hang out with people like that their bad habits rub off on you, and her influence can make you a worse person too.

Post # 15
1614 posts
Bumble bee

There’s really no point in bringing it up unless you want to salvage the friendship, which why would you want to? Ghost her. Sounds likes she’s always been petty af, so why would she stop now? If she says something about it later, learn how to say “because you’re a backstabbing a-hole” in French or something, and toodaloo the F outta there.  

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