- 5 years ago
Hi bees, it has been a very sad/stressful few weeks for me. 🙁
I graduated from college on May 10, and the next day I had my graduation party. Ex-FI ended up getting very intoxicated and proceeded to yell, scream, threaten, and cuss everybody out AT MY PARTY. He was under the (drunken) impression that another guy at the party was trying to talk down to him (even though he was not, I saw the whole thing) and he absolutely went bananas. He completely humiliated me in front of several friends and family members.
The next day, I ended the engagement and called off the wedding. It’s sad because I’ve been with this man for 5.5 years, we have been planning a wedding since December and were supposed to get married in November. I never saw this coming.
Although I ended the engagement, I am still speaking to him. He has been very remorseful and sweet, and I genuinely think he has learned from this, but there is still a nagging thought in the back of my mind asking what if? He has apologized to everyone involved, even to my parents, who had already left the party when this happened. I have come up with the decision that I want to try to work things out, but I’m still having doubts.
I know time will be the only thing that can heal this, and that’s under the best of cirumstances. Do you think I’m doing the right thing by taking it slow, starting over, and trying to forgive, forget, and let go?
ETA: I forgot to add this to my original post, but sadly this is not the first time it has happened. The first time was not as bad, as it was between just him and I with nobody else around. He still treated me very badly that first night nonetheless, and he promised he would never do it again. Well, he did anyway obviously. It scares me that this behavior seems to be forming a pattern, but I can tell how sorry he is this time. There is a huge difference in his remorse from the first time to this time.