Post # 1
I have posted a bit about the issues my FI and I are having my future in-laws. We have been talking about it a lot and are currently considering having a courthouse wedding sometime this fall/winter. We want to avoid family drama, and to be honest, neither of us are attached to the idea of having a big wedding. Yes, it would be nice to wear a big fluffy dress and all that jazz. But at this point, we both just want to be married and move on. How did you ladies tell your families that you were not having a “wedding”? How did everyone react? Did eloping/having a private ceremony cause issues with your friends and family? I don’t know anyone who has done this before and while it is really really appealing, I am worried about the fallout.
Post # 3
@ladychatterley: Just because you’re not having a huge wedding doesn’t mean you can’t wear the dress of your dreams. I had a 3k Paloma Blanca mermaid gown that I still wore. It’s still your wedding day, you wear what you want!
I’m not going to lie, there were some family members that took the elopement really poorly. However, in the end if they really love and care about you guys, they’ll be happy that you’re both happy. We had our August 4 wedding all planned out, and one day I called DH and was bawling. I told him that I wanted to scrap the wedding and run off to the coast, so we did! It was just too much stress, too much money, and like you guys neither of us wanted a huge wedding either. It was out of sheer pressure that we even planned the large event. It wasn’t what we really wanted, and we should have never gone down that road.
It was the best choice that we ever made. We didn’t tell anyone, we just went. We had a weekend on the coast in a beautiful, oceanfront jacuzzi suite and when we got home, we made calls.
I also designed some elopement announcements and we mailed them as we were leaving town the day of the wedding so most of the people would get the announcements that weekend.
It was the best choice that he and I have ever made. While it did cause some issues, nothing affected the fact that we both had the best weekend of our lives. In the end, everyone accepted the fact that we were happy, got married, and that was that.
Post # 4
@ladychatterley: I did the courthouse thing for my first wedding. However, your question could apply to any type of elopement not just courthouses!
Now there are as many different styles courthouse weddings as there are traditional weddings. My courthouse wedding was SUPER uneventful. Like hardly dressing up, no rings, went back to work, two witnesses. Blah. I had a hard time getting my then spouse to make the day special and I couldn’t make it special all by myself.
There are tons of adorable NICE courthouse weddings out there. If you do go that route – just make it special! Whehter that means a nice dress, a nice meal out, a photographer, writing your own vows, etc. Something!
My family had NEVER MET my ex at the time we got married. They were not upset, in fact they said I had a good head on my shoulders and they trusted me! I save a lot of peple money in airfare and hotels too. (Later I realized I did not make a good decision!)
For my second marriage, we made sure to make this what we wanted. It was really us and we really made it special (it was my H’s first marriage). We had two witnesses this time too (his parents). I don’t think anyone in my famly was upset. His sister was not upset either. I mean it’s a butt load of money to fly with kids, get a car, get a hotel, meals out, etc. They are probably secretly thanking us for saving them money and vacation days. However, they didn’t have to be so apathetic about it all!