Post # 1

Member
470 posts
Helper bee
Hi all!
Thanks in advance for your suggestions and help …
My fiance and I are both Catholic, but admittedly bad ones. We’re getting married in the church (mostly for his family, but we very happy to do so and couldn’t think of a better place to be married), and are having a “modified” mass – our priest is blessing the bread and wine prior to the ceremony instead of in front of our guests. He’s also given us quite a bit of freedom with the ceremony structure/readings/songs, etc. We’re doing one religious reading and one secular reading and have been given permission to do such. The processional and recessional will be secular music, but I do want a hymn or two in there! We will not be having a musician or soloist (trying to cut back on costs). The most beautiful part of mass to me is the music, but I’m having a hard time finding hymns that I like – mostly because I’m unfamiliar. Any favourites you’d like to share with me? One last question, are psalms always sung? I’m getting conflicting information from different sources!
Again, thank you!! 🙂
Post # 3

Member
3101 posts
Sugar bee
@jordyanna: Wow, lots of questions.
No, the psalm does not need to be sung. The lector can read the psalm and the congregation can speak the response.
My favorite song from our wedding mass was “Song of the Body of Christ.” “Ave Maria” is another VERY popular wedding song.
Honestly, it sounds like you’re kind of butchering the mass. As a Catholic who goes to daily mass, I would be upset and uncomfortable with attending a mass that was significantly altered, mainly because that’s the beauty of Catholic (meaning “universal”) Church–it’s so consistent.
In fact I’m not sure how it would even be a mass if you “modify” both the readings and the consecration. The mass has two parts–the Liturgy of the Word and the Liturgy of the Eucharist. You’re talking about editing out both of those essential aspects, which again, does not sound like a mass. Just my two cents.
Post # 4

Member
470 posts
Helper bee
@ceebree: I agree with you, it’s more to appease both sides of the family – his side is predominantly Catholic, whereas mine is not and have threatened to not show up … Or to show up “and play on their phones” the whole time. When we were in Pre-Cana, the priest that spoke actually recommended that we do a Celebration of Marriage without a Mass – but it didn’t sit well with his side of the family. We’re just trying to find common ground.
Post # 5

Member
1785 posts
Buzzing bee
But you and your fiance are both Catholic? How is his family not Catholic? I am confused.
Post # 6

Member
470 posts
Helper bee
@newbabybee: His side is Catholic and practicing. Most people in my family are baptized, but almost all are non-practicing and don’t believe in the Church, etc., all of which happened after I was baptized. A lot of my family are very vocal about their displeasure of my church wedding.
Post # 7

Member
784 posts
Busy bee
@jordyanna: I also think that the celebration of marriage without Mass would be more appropriate for you and your guest list.
I’m also struggling with music selections. Keep in mind that you generally can’t use pre recorded music in Church, so the songs that you choose show be easy to sing a long to, since they will be acapella essentially. I’m actually really surprised that your priest is allowing secular processional and recessional – are they going to be sung/performed?
Post # 8

Member
309 posts
Helper bee
@jordyanna: Fiance and I are Catholic, and we considered having a shorter prayer service type ceremony vs a full mass as well.
Ave Maria is a good one, as is All I Ask Of You and Amazing Grace. My Parents had Let there Be Peace on Earth, which we’ll probably use too.
Post # 9

Member
564 posts
Busy bee
If your guests are not predominantly Catholic, and you don’t feel strongly about having Mass, I would have the shorter ceremony that doesn’t include it, honestly.
That said, if you’re looking for traditional Catholic wedding hymns, try “Ave Maria” as was mentioned previously, “Come and Journey with Me,” “Where There is Love,” and “Panus Angelicus” are all nice. Keep in mind though, if you’re doing a mass, the songs will need to coordinate with what you’re doing, such as the presentation of the gifts, etc. – so a typical “wedding” song might not be appropriate.
It might help to speak with whomever is playing the organ (?) and ask what they’re familiar with.
Post # 10

Member
3101 posts
Sugar bee
@jordyanna: That sounds like a really sticky situation. I’m sorry to say, but that aspect of your relationship will never get easier!
Post # 11

Member
58 posts
Worker bee
- Wedding: June 2014 - Catholic Church and Lord Hill Farms
Love Divine all love excelling is a traditional hymn at my Catholic church with the theme of love