MemberNo garter toss, bouquet, no asking parent for permission, no one walking me down the aisle. Probably no name change. I have a ballgown wedding dress, veil (not over face). I am working on the vows but definitely no “obey”
MemberNo love “her as you love yourself” in the vows for the groom only.
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Traditions I’ve changed my mind on:
MemberDidnt ask my father
We are walking down the isle together.
No veil
No flowergirl
No ring bearer/no children at the wedding
No father daughter dance
Memberonly thing i can think of is we are writing our own vows, and i’m not wearing a veil, just a nice hair piece.
MemberMemberNo garter toss, nothing in the vows about “obey.” I’m also going to make sure that our officiant doesn’t say anything about how the wife “leaves her home and family and friends” to join with the man, unless he talks about the man doing so as well. 😛
I’m still struggling with the “who gives this woman” part. My ceremony is Catholic so not sure how much we can change.
I’m still having the bouquet toss because I think it’s fun to go home with flowers. At least, that’s how I felt when I used to participate in it.
MemberI’m really up in the air on a few, some for equality and some because I just don’t like them:
MemberWe are not doing the bouquet toss or garter, because it makes me feel weird having all these people “begging” for marriage at my feet, and then watching my Husband find my garter with his teeth and fling it at a group of men. I do not like the symbolism at all, nor do I want people imagining my lady parts as he does this.
While I have a father, and a grandfather, I have chosen my birthmom (I have 2 moms) to walk me down the aisle because she is the strongest woman I know and has never doubted me, left my side or questioned my decisions. She is the only person who has always been there for everything, so she will be walking me. Also, I will need her strength as I do this without crumbling into a mess, since I am so emotional. Hehe
My Fi is still on the fence, but I am trying to convince him that we should both change our names to Mr and Mrs MyLastName HisLastName (or vice versa, no hyphen). This way it is clear we are our own family, and our children will have both of our names.
We will be writing our own vows, nothing will refer to “his household” or anything unequal. They will be love and sharing based. We will not be pronounced man and wife, but as Mr and Mrs Our new last name.
We will not be doing designated child-parent dances, but will open up the floor at the end of our dance to dance with all the family members in a group. I want everyone included.
No traditional veil – though I will have a birdcage and fascinator.
I am definitely not pure, and my wedding get-up will have colour to match my personality. Not pure white.
Member– He didn’t ask permission
– I’m keeping my name
– No Veil
– No Garter Toss
– No Bouquet Toss
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MemberI am keeping my name. Had it for 54 years and his ex-wife has the same first and middle name as I do. And she is born in the same month and from the same home town…
My father is escorting me down the aisle. He is THRILLED!
I am wearing a very smal veil.
Our vows are tradtional Presbyterian vows, the usual – foresake all others, honor, in sickness and healther, richer and poorer, til death. I do not like writing one’s own vows, especially if you are having a church ceremony, which was my #1 requirement; no fields, no beach, no moutaintop – in a church, with a minister in the eyes of God!
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Member– Any readings or vows that imply a woman should be submissive to the man or that the man is the leader or head of the marriage. People should just be respectful of each other, man or woman. That solves that.
– Garter toss. I don’t have the kind of personality that carries that off well, and I would feel kind of degraded with another person’s hand up my dress in front of a hundred people and everyone whistling and cat-calling. For me, no thanks.
– I was picky about father-daughter song. I didn’t want any of those “Daddy’s little girl angel cupcake” type songs…I’m a grown woman, not a child. We did a co-father-daughter/mother-son dance to What a Wonderful World.
MemberThe topic ‘Calling all feminist bees: What traditions are you skipping and why?’ is closed to new replies.