(Closed) Calling all introverts! Things you hate people saying to you

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 17
Member
2966 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

My BFF is incredibly fun, and she always has an opinon and feelings about everything. Whenever we talk, she tells me everything and anything there is to know about everything. I sit there, listen, and aknowledge her comments with whatever is appropriate (smile; awe; gasp;w/e). 

She then stops and says, “Well, why don’t you share something?” UHM. I Do not analyze everything under the sun & you obviously have entirely too many feelings about everything. 

We’ve had endless conversations about how “she doesn’t feel my love/like I appreciate her” WHAT? First of all, I am not your boyfriend/husband. Second of all, I do the best kind of thing there is: Listen to you talk non stop. Doesn’t bother me. But don’t ask me to go off on tangents about all the shit you feel, because I simply cannot. 

end rant. 

Post # 18
Member
1108 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

My Fiance is introverted (I am a little too) and my family is always asking me “Does he not like us?  Is he mad at us?  Why is he so quiet?”  He knows he is quiet and actually tries really hard to open up and talk more, but it’s so frustrating when my family make a big deal of it.  

Post # 19
Member
2564 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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@bowsergirl:  Ah, you are one of my people.  Making friends isn’t that easy for some…  I wish I had actual friends here but the crappy truth is, it’s pretty much just Fiance and our pets and sometimes (ok, most all of the time) I am 100% ok with that.  A lot less small talk I have to deal with, IMO

Post # 20
Member
308 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I hate it when people say, “Shut up over there, you are talking too much”….ugh! And as others have already posted…”What’s wrong? Why are you so quiet?” Annoying!

Post # 21
Member
507 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Our church and then at The Garden Room for the reception

“Why are you so quiet?”

“Do you ever speak?”

Pardon me while I bang my head repeatedly on the table….

Yell

 

Post # 22
Member
1603 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I’m very lucky in that, while I’m an introvert and my Fiance is a classic extrovert, he’s really truly come to understand how I feel when I explain that I need time alone to recharge my social batteries. He loves the fact that he can act as that battery when we’re home alone, or when we’re out with people. 🙂

Post # 23
Member
507 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Our church and then at The Garden Room for the reception

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@MrsRevolutionize:  I’ve explained that exact thing to my guy. I love that he “gets” it, too. 🙂 Isn’t it great when they can be so supportive about it?

Post # 24
Member
509 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

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@PetraArkanian:  I completely agree with you! Whenever I get the, why are you so quiet, my main response, is “because I can’t get a word in”. I can’t stand when people talk just to hear their own voices, and I much rather say few things of meaning than just think outloud and ramble. If it’s a competition to speak… I just don’t.
It’s funny, because I wouldn’t really consider myself to be shy, I feel pretty comfortable giving presentations etc. But being in a big group of people, where it’s basically a competition to see who can talk about themselves the most… count me out.

Any introverts on here read the book Quiet? I’ve started it and it’s really good! It basically discounts the notion that there’s something wrong with being introverted and it’s something that needs to be fixed.

Post # 25
Member
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Oh, and I totally forgot about “Networking is all about talking to them.” 

No. I do not want to network with someone I do not know. No, I do not want to ask this stranger with a better job than me for a weird favor. And no, I’m not shy. It’s just a waste of my time. 

Post # 26
Member
4047 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

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@futuremrs1986:  Whenever I get the, why are you so quiet, my main response, is “because I can’t get a word in”.

Ugh, this is so how I feel. Sometimes I really do have interesting things to say, but I am not going to talk over others in order to have my voice heard. So half the time when I am quiet it’s not for lack of things to say – it’s that no one else will bother to shush.

ETA: Oh, and I’ve had that book in my Amazon cart for a while now, and I will definitely read it at some point.

Post # 27
Member
4047 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

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@mrs_pudding_pop:  Right? I have a hard time making friends because I can’t get past the small talk. I can only discuss my hometown with people so many times before I give up. And I’m not interested in having dozens of acquaintances and light friends. Give me a couple best friends I can have deep conversations with, and I am fully content. I wish others would understand that and realize I’m not a social pariah for not being surrounded by people. I’ve discussed this with my mother and she has just flat out said, “But you’re not an introvert. You can choose to go out there and meet people.” Ugh, yes I am, and that’s not my point!

Post # 28
Member
730 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I’d classify myself as a later-in-life-introvert. I honestly never realized this of myself until just the last couple of years! 

in social situations, and at work I can blend and be extroverted for short periods of time; enough that it truly stretches my last nerves. So, At home, I CANNOT STAND noise, chatter, blather, and excessive talking, JUST for the sake of filling up otherwise peaceful, quiet air. Therefore, my biggest pet peeve is the incessant “what’s wrong? Why are you mad????” from my husband and the kids. 

Yeah, I’m not stupid, I get it…two teens and two Tweens make a LOT of noise and just LOVE to hear each other and themselves TALK all the friggin time. Hubs? He’s a talker too. the 5 against me, well, I’m odd man out. And it’s literally PAINFUL to exist in this environment at times. 

I tell them “I don’t need to talk because you all are doing it for me.” or “I couldn’t get a word in edgewise if I even wanted to” “I can barely breathe in here because all the air is getting sucked out of the room” etc. when they come diggin at me with all the what’s wrong crap. 

ERRRHHH!!! Good thing this is a vent thread 😉 can ya tell I’m chiming in after being at work all day and coming home to this deafening chaos???? definite grumpy introvert here!!!!

Post # 29
Member
1936 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I’m an introverted extrovert, and my SO is a straight up introvert. My friends are all very used to my extroverted side, and one of my besties commented that my SO should probably try a little harder instead of acting selfish and letting others feel uncomfortable trying so hard to talk to him….

 

It took all my strength not to slap her upside the head.

Post # 30
Member
1469 posts
Bumble bee

“Is everything ok?” 

Is one i hate, yes everything is ok even tho I dont talk 24/7. Sigh, sometimes I feel like extroverts just don’t understand. Big groups drain me. I just went through 5 weeks of training with the same group of 22 mostly extroverts everyday. I would come home so drained and annoyed. 

Post # 31
Member
91 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

 

 

I love this! My Fiance is a introvert, I am a extrovert, and I have learnt to respect his and other introvert’s hamster balls =) I wish other extroverts will do the same!

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