(Closed) Calling off the wedding?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1849 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Have you brought this up (calmly) to your FI? What’s his opinion? If you gently persuade him to talk to them about giving you a hard time, they might back off. I would ask him to talk to them in his own words though, not to say specific things you told him to say. It shouldn’t sound like you’re complaining to him and asking him to take your side, more like he’s interested in keeping the peace and he can see that you could use a break. 

Post # 4
Member
772 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Mrs.G3:  are there any consignment or once/never worn bridal stores where you can try to find a more affordable flower girl dress?  granted, I don’t agree with her being bitchy and saying you don’t understand what it’s like to pay bills?  that’s just silly.  but, if she’s financially strapped, rather than get frustrated, try to be the bigger person and offer solutions.  consignment shops, ebay, etc… you can find affordable options.

as far as the crazy aunt – the hell with her.  she will get over it, and if she doesn’t, well then she truly is nuts and you want to keep her as far away as possible anyway.

do your best to keep you nerve here.  weddings tend to bring out the worst in people.  focus on the positive and know that soon enough it will be over and you will be married.  that is the ultiimate goal.

Post # 7
Member
1849 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

At least he’s being supportive! Sounds to me like he might need to have another chat with them and make it clear that they are literally causing you to question whether you want a wedding. If they have a heart, they will chill. Especially the aunt needs to realize that her complaining about the lack of an invite won’t fix anything. Either there won’t even be an invitation and she’ll stay mad, or there will be an insincere invitation in response to harrassment, and then no one is happy. As for the SIL, sounds like she’s just a hostile individual with her own problems. Let her know that you will do her the kind favor of allowing her to leave the bridal party and save a little money. Don’t let them bully you into giving up an experience you were excited about. 

However, if the whole thing was never that exciting for you to begin with and you’re going through all this stress to please other peple, consider cutting back and doing something simpler. In any case, just don’t let them hijack this whole experience and do whatever you decide is best. Worst case scenario, just completely ignore them until they get that you have more important things to put your energy into. 

Post # 8
Member
772 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Mrs.G3:  yikes – ok she is being impossible.  you can either nut up in the meantime and push through or have a chat with her.  i would just ask her point blank, “do you want your daughter to be the flower girl?  it would mean the world to me, but if you have any apprehension, then you need to let me know.”  if she says “no, no problem” then push the issue further.  provide the examples you’ve given us.  and a necessary conversation is not the same as a knock down, drag out fight.  keep you’re cool, even if she loses hers. 

Post # 10
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2007

Come to Vegas, no drama here!

Post # 11
Member
967 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Oh my!  You even suggested her to buy a flower girl dress at a yard sale and she nixed it?  I think you are trying really hard to compromise….I really do feel your pain…my own sister is acting impossible….so I get it….

David’s is the best for plus sized dresses and the most inexpensive….that’s why I chose it since my sister is plus sized….the dresses are normally under $100….

Post # 12
Member
275 posts
Helper bee

@Mrs.G3:  WARNING!! You’re on the internets posting under your real name/FB profile. Shit could get a ton more ugly if your soon to be relatives Google you and find this thread. Just saying…

 

 

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