(Closed) can a secondary virgin wear a veil over her face

posted 10 years ago in Traditions
  • poll: can a secondary virgin wear a veil over her face

    yes

    no

    it doesn't matter

  • Post # 46
    Member
    2297 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    Our attendants for our wedding were my adult children.  I’m not a secondary or any other type of virgin.  I wore a veil.

    Post # 47
    Member
    1752 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @MrsNeutrino:   that made me giggle 🙂

     

    I have a question for anyone, including the OP, who has “reclaimed” their virginity – obviously you know you’ve had sex before and aren’t actually a virgin – so is the reclaiming thing for religious purposes? Would you tell people, including those you date, that you’re a virgin – or would you explain that you’d had sex before and then “reclaimed” your virginity.  I guess I don’t get it because, in my mind, your virginity is no one’s business but your own, so if you know you’ve had sex before, what would be the reason behind not just being OK with the fact that you’ve had sex before?

    Post # 48
    Member
    1169 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    The idea that the veil symbolizes purity/modesty/virginity is an absolute modern interpretation of the tradition. Much like how the white wedding dress only came into fashion during the days of Queen Victoria. The original meaning of the veil is somewhat murky but probably related to the story of Jacob/Rachel/Leah in the bible–which has basically nothing to do with purity! I’ve heard interpretations from it being the groom’s promise to clothe his bride (in Jewish tradition the groom puts on the veil before the ceremony) to symbolic of how the groom isn’t marrying the bride for beauty but rather love, to blah blah blah. 

    Point is…you can wear a veil with the blusher over your face and it will be absolutely fine.

    Post # 49
    Member
    348 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I’m not a virgin…but I will be wearing a blusher…I want one and it’s my wedding so i don’t think I really care what tradition says at this point….

    Post # 50
    Member
    2126 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: January 1992

    I’m not sure why you would call your self a secondary virgin, but that’s none of my business. No one’s going to stand up and demand proof of your virginity if you wear a blusher.

    Post # 51
    Member
    2402 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: February 2010

    traditions are nice, but I really cringe when people seem to think there are hard and fast rules. wear whatever you want, it’s your day!

    think about all the non-virgins who wear white wedding dresses. obviously nobody worries about that one anymore!

     

    Post # 52
    Member
    60 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Going slightly off topic, but @bearlove is right — white wedding dresses symbolising purity is a modern gloss on the tradition. Apparently Queen Victoria, who kicked off the white wedding dress trend, chose the colour for reasons of patriotism rather than ideas of virtue — she wanted to give the domestic lace industry a boost, so wore Honiton lace. It was also more common for royals to wear metallic fabrics, gold and the like, because of how expensive they were, and wearing plain old white fabric was a statement against that.

    Sorry, couldn’t resist — I love wedding customs trivia! I’d wear a veil if you want to. There are probably any number of meanings you can ascribe to it if you Google “wedding veil meaning”, since veils pop up in a lot of different cultures. I quite like the idea that it’s a way of hiding my horns (see here: http://www.seiyaku.com/customs/veil/veil-japan.html)!

    Post # 53
    Member
    143 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: December 2015

    @MrsCarnival: I wish I could like your comment!

    Post # 54
    Member
    3 posts
    Wannabee

    @Calla85: You would be surprised. I was actually confronted by one of my friends because I am wearing a pure white dress, despite not being chaste. Of all the nerve!

     

    Rock your viel, girl! It’s all about YOU

    Post # 56
    Member
    2402 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: February 2010

    @Little Slippers: I was actually confronted by one of my friends because I am wearing a pure white dress, despite not being chaste. Of all the nerve! 

    whoa, no way!  what century does she think she’s from? 

    Post # 57
    Member
    257 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @Calla85: I agree with you…I even don’t know anyone over the age of 23 who is a virgin (primary or secondary)!

    Post # 59
    Member
    125 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I’ve never heard of a ‘secondary virgin’ before.  Once you’ve had sex, you’ve had sex. 

    Post # 60
    Member
    252 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    the veil has never had anything to do with purity or virgin anything. It was created when marriages were mainly arranged without the bride and groom’s consent, and the bride would cover her face until the marriage was final so that the groom could not back out simply due to what she looked like. Nowadays it is a fashion statement and sort of a passing-into-womanhood ritual, when the bride’s father lifts her veil, he also lifts his control over her and releases her to her new family. Mainly fashion. The only part of your attire that has anything to do with purity or virgin is a white dress, and even that has been changed to symbolize joy rather than virginity because so many brides are not virgins when they marry.

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