(Closed) Can I ask my Future Step MIL to NOT wear a certain dress??

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
2866 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I think you already know the answer: You can’t tell a grown woman how to dress. I don’t think it looks terrible- it does have some purple in it. If she looks silly in it that reflects on her and not you. It’s too late to take back what you said, but I’d try to be kind to her, she sounds frustrated. 

Post # 4
Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I wouldnt feel bad if she ASKED and you told her your honest opinion…  and i wouldnt feel bad if SHE chooses to get another dress..  i agree with you 100% on the colors but in all honesty i know from dealing with my Future Mother-In-Law that it might be hard to sway her if shes really set on it

my Future Mother-In-Law bought a champage dress.. ( when im wearing ivory) then sent me an email AFTER it was bought asking me was i ok with it.. what could i say? 

Good luck in what you decide

Post # 5
Member
8738 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

Honestly I think the dress she picked does have some of the main colors in it, maybe you could tell her that the original dress is fine and maybe suggest she get a purple cardigan or shawl to help keep her warm and bring out the purple.

Post # 6
Member
491 posts
Helper bee

I think the dress is fine. It has purple in it, I don’t know the other colors so I can’t really see a problem with fushia and orange. 

Like a PP said – If she looks silly – it’s on her. If she feels beautiful in a dress she is happy with, I think you should let her be unless it’s awful – which this one doesn’t seem to be. 

Post # 8
Member
3773 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

I think that dress is a completely different vibe then the others. Has she tried that dress on?That material is very unforviging so maybe she won’t even lke it on.

You gave your opinion and now all you can do is tell her to pick a dress that she feels good in. As long as it isn’t white or a bridal gown let her pick something she likes.

Post # 10
Member
5479 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I like the idea @KatNYC2011:  had about a purple cardigan or wrap- it would really make the purple in the dress stand out more.  I’d tell her that I looked at the dress again, and you didn’t notice that it even had purple in it, but with a wrap or cardigan it would bring it out nicely. 

Post # 12
Member
2999 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@KatNYC2011:  Agreed.

A shawl is actually a really good idea. I live in OH and it should start getting a bit chilly around then.

Post # 13
Member
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I agree with you that the dress isn’t ideal for a fall wedding, but I would never tell anyone what they can or can’t wear. Just be glad she’s not wearing white! 😛

Post # 15
Member
2866 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I feel ya on not wanting her to stick out. I mean it isn’t the most appropriate dress for a Mother-In-Law to wear, but it’s not so bad. I’d maybe just let it lie for now. My mom was so stressed and hard on herself when shopping for my brother’s wedding. She was worried about her size, colors etc. and any amount of trying to help just made her more flustered. She will find something and get over the hurt feelings ( which probably have more to do with her insecurity than you) and it will work out!

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