(Closed) Can I be upset about this? My (female) boss said…. [Halloween Related]

posted 5 years ago in Career
Post # 46
Member
6447 posts
Bee Keeper

mchitt329:  I’m surprised you were allowed to wear a costume to work.  Granted her comment was out of line, but that’s not appropriate to wear to work.  Unless you work in a strip club, kidding, but seriously, that’s way too tight and unprofessional to wear to work.

Post # 47
Member
446 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

 

mchitt329:  I’m going to have to disagree with most PP here and say that if your zipper was much further up and you were wearing your normal slacks, then it doesn’t so much look like a stripper.

To be honest, it’s probably the hat that set the comment off, since its leather and all.

ETA: I just wanted to add that i work for a large Fortune 500 company and wearing costumes is NOT looked down upon. I don’t know what kind of stuffy, stiff world other PPs are living in, but not every place discourages Halloween costumes. We just had our annual trick or treat in the lobby of our building, and employees do dress up as well.

  • This reply was modified 5 years ago by  mdcmod.
  • This reply was modified 5 years ago by  mdcmod.
Post # 48
Member
549 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

mchitt329:  if you are wearing it how you described, then i don’t think it’s inappropriate at all. I’ve worked in a lot of professional environments in NYC and dressing in a costume covered up with normal pants, shirt zipper done up, no thigh high boots, etc…. is NOT inappropriate! 

You probably just looked hot and she felt threatened….? Can you settle this debate by posting a pic of yourself in the costume? LOL

By The Way, just because the costume NAME online has the word “sexy” doesn’t mean that it’s a stripper costume. It’s all in how you wear it and present yourself. (red lipstick, dark eye makeup and boobs hanging out versus subtle makeup and no cleave.) I agree it’s hard as a woman to find a costume that DOESNT have the word “sexy” in it, unless you are ultra creative and can make something on your own.

Post # 49
Member
1731 posts
Bumble bee

mchitt329:  OMG! You wore that to work? It’s a cute costume but a little suggestive for work.

 

Post # 50
Member
9097 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

If the thigh high boot fits. You can be upset if you want, but I don’t think any “sexy” costume is workplace appropriate.

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Post # 51
Member
1576 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think you did a good job trying to cover up the “stripperness” of the costume, but I think just the fact that stripper-cop is such cliche sort of thing that your costume is not fixable. Like it’s in people’s heads that it’s a popular costume for a stripper. Coupled with the fact that your costume has a zipper that seems to be for that exact purpose. It’s just like one of those subconscious word-association things.

You should have just worn the hat with a blue shirt and black pants. Also, a boss should never tell an employee that he or she looks like a stripper.

Post # 52
Member
192 posts
Blushing bee

I would never wear this to work and I work in a very relaxed environment. If I was your boss I would have done a touble take when you walked in for sure.

Post # 53
Member
11612 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

mchitt329:  I never suggested it was, in fact, if you read accurately, I said otherwise and pointed out that it might be perceived that way.

perception matters, even when it’s unfair. 

 

also, based on your bizarre  response and failure to grasp the point that perception matters, indicating that are so obtuse as to miss my point and then managed to get yourself outraged by something I never said, I’m gonna go with you aren’t seeing reality as clearly as you could.

 I’ll make it clear for you: Do not dress like that at work. 

Post # 54
Member
141 posts
Blushing bee

We always dress up for work–it’s a creative environment–and some of the art directors I work with go completely over-the-top with unique costumes. BUT. No matter how relaxed an office is, if it’s a workplace, you have to ask yourself:

1. “Could an elementary school teacher wear this costume to work today?” If she couldn’t without major complaints from the parents, it is absolutely not appropriate for the workday.

2. “Is this something that people wear for sexual role-play with their partners?” If it is, it is absolutely not appropriate for the workday. Your workmates’ minds don’t want to go there. Wear it to a party with your friends in the evening.

Post # 55
Member
141 posts
Blushing bee

For the future, if you want a store-bought costume for the workplace, buy a small size of a man’s costume. If something is specifically billed a “woman’s” costume in a Halloween store, it’s almost always of the “sexy” variety. That’s pretty much been a thing for years.

Post # 56
Member
1576 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

bgu073:  I think this is the best advice on the thread. Next time, if you want to go store-bought, buy a men’s costume. That should fix your problem.

Post # 58
Member
209 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

Did you look good in it? If you did, hence the comment. Some woman say things like that out of jealousy. 

Take down the zipper if you got it, flaunt it and don’t give a shit. Who cares if it’s inappropriate?? 

Post # 59
Member
7646 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

mchitt329:  I would have posted a pic of yourself in the outfit and asked if it were appropriate because this picture screams inappropriate, the boots, cleavage, all of it, but I think wearing it the way you’re describing doesn’t sound inapprorpiate at all.

Post # 60
Member
207 posts
Helper bee

If you were wearing regular office pants on the bottom I don’t think it is a big deal. Yor boss was maybe a little out of line. Obviously how she said it and your ofiiice ulture are unknowns so I an’t say whether anyone was really out o line. I work in a small law office and since we have no clients in today I am wearing a halloween t-shirt, yoga pants and all my halloween jewlery.

I’m not sure why some people are saying that all law offices are so stuffy. We dress very casually at my office and only wear our dress clothes if we have clients in the office or have to be in court! In fact, I regularly do not wear shoes!

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