(Closed) Can I invite my six co-workers…and not my boss?

posted 11 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
18628 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I wouldn’t invite all of them.  I would invite ones that you are close to and draw the line at that.

Post # 4
2633 posts
Sugar bee

Well, office politics are weird here.  I’m pretty much in an “invite them all or don’t invite any of them” situation. 

So, I’ll be inviting them all.  I have a feeling that I’ll get mostly “no’s” and I’m ok with that – at least the people who I WANT to be there will be there.

Post # 5
1937 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I am inviting my boss (and several old bosses) even though we have never socialized outside of work.  I work in a small industry where everyone seems to know one another and I don’t think it can hurt to include these people by inviting them.  I’m not even sure if a few of them will attend.  If you are inviting multiple people at your office, unfortunately your boss will most likely find out eventually (probably an innocent slip up) and might feel slighted that s/he wasn’t invited.  (That obviously shouldn’t affect your work review, maybe just interpersonal communication between the two of you.)  If the majority of people that you work with are invited, I would invite your boss.

Post # 6
1246 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

i would invite my boss, but i work at a credit union and we are open saturdays, soooo who would run the center?

Post # 7
63 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Orange County Performing Arts Center

I totally am inviting a few coworkers and not my boss. I’m a little worried about it too.  It’s not that I don’t like my boss or anything, but when I ordered my list of who I want, there just wasn’t any space. 


I’m trying to not feel obligated to invite ppl and only include ppl I really want to have there. Hope that helps. Good luck!

Post # 8
54 posts
Worker bee

In a lot of situations, I feel like this is probably an all or nothing type of thing. But it also depends on your office environment and daily interaction level with your boss.

Post # 10
652 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

im going to have to go with the invite all or none because whether they want to come, they will probably be offended

Post # 11
751 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I invited 2 or my 3 bosses (talk about tricky)  and 3 of 12 coworkers.  It’s worked out fine and at the end of the day, NONE of them are coming.  No one seemed offended that they were or weren’t invited – it’s a small enough office I would have heard the gossip if there was an issue.

Don’t invite your boss because you feel obligated.  Wedding are personal events in your personal life and you don’t have to mix business and personal.  I know some people on here will disagree with that, but I think it’s true.

Post # 12
7172 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I think if you invite more than just your one friend, you have to invite them all (including your boss).  It sounds like you work in a small office and because of that – no way around it, unfortunately.

Think of it this way – your boss will likely find it flattering that you invited him (even if he finds it awkward) – AND, just because you invite him, doesn’t mean that he’d go!  And, if he did go, you’ll be surrounded with so many other people that day, other than greeting him, you’ll probably not really interact with him.

As for the co-worker who is hinting at going – don’t let her do that to you!  Simply say – it’s going to be a small affair of close family and friends – sorry!  You don’t have to invite them, just because they are expecting it.  If you left the company – would you REALLY ever talk to these people again?  Probably not.  My vote is for invite your one friend and forget the rest.  

Post # 14
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Invite those you hang out with outside work and actually consider to be friends.  Unless you are discussing wedding details with them all you don’t HAVE to invite anyone you don’t want to.  If you are discussing wedding details with all of them then you do need to invite them, or else it seems rude not to (because by discussing the details they will assume they are invited).  Hope this helps!

Post # 16
1001 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I would not ever invite my boss to a social event.  It seems like it’s crossing boundaries, or something.  I have a small office of 15 people, and I invited the 3 I am closest to.  We’re friends outside of work too, though.

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