- 5 years ago
- Wedding: November 1999
so i have been obsessing over getting details picked out for our Oct wedding for a long time now. ive been engaged for almost a year already. the wedding is still…at this time, 9 months away. we r having a destination, and have hired a coordinator who will take care of most of the logistics of planning for us. ive been racking my brain to make decisions for a long ass time and really, theres just too much darn variety and cute stuff out there to choose ideas from.
we have made a few key decisions like set the date and decided on and secured the venue. ive tried on dresses, and pretty much made a decision and about ready to order, sent out save the dates, set the budget, announced our website, taken engagement pics, and finalized the guest list. all the early stuff that needs to be hashed out well in advance. since then, ive been researching all the vendors and scouring over pinterest, google, posting on the bee, etsy, the knot, reading magazines, etc to gather more and more inspiration. still doing this, every day, day after day.
now the problem i feel is that the dang thing is still SO far away! alot of the stuff that i have left to get finalized is related to guest count, like menu choices and budget for that, invitation wording and ordering, total and arrangement of reception decor and budget (depends on how many tables i end up needing), how much traditional reception to plan (not having a bridal party so that limits reception activties).
now that save the dates r out, and destination weddings need SO much advanced notice, now theres nothing to do but wait wait wait to see my guest acceptance turnout and THEN get serious about finalizing things and see how the budget goes. im not doing anything diy since i dont want to ship handmade items over to the caribbean.
its a weird dynamic having a (by choice) long engagement, a destination wedding (that generally takes less effort to plan especially with a coordinator), and then waiting the next 10 months to pass (already been waiting a year almost remember) for the final RSVP date to make final key decisions.
the urgency, the momentum of planning, and then nothing for a long time. isnt this is a wedding? doesnt it have to get planned? arent these critical decisions that need to be made asap?? not really! not yet anyway. it all feels very weird and kinda cruel lol.
it feels urgent but its not. im obsessing over stuff and just not really being able to enjoy being engaged. its so far out and im just ready to get it overwith! i knew i wanted a long engagement, but i didnt realize i would obsess like this and drive myself bonkers! i feel like if i could just get the whole thing planned down the last minute detail right now, i could relax and just enjoy the next 9 months. but i cant. no bride can really, no matter what kind of wedding she plans.
so basically im now back to my original question, how the heck do i just turn off my brain and think about something else!?!?!?!