Post # 1
ok,so i love my awsome unique last name,i dont want to lose it.ive had it for 41 years.my husband told me he dont blame me if i dont want to take his last name because its funny,but i know it would mean alot to him.i do want to share a last name with him,but at the same time i dont want to loose mine.here is the thing.
i have my own business,i really want to keep my business with my last name and for financial reasons,i will still file my taxes separate from my husband.i can loose clients by word of mouth if i change my last name.and my tax lady told me it will be a mess for husband and i to file together and we will owe big time versus not by legally filing separte.
is there a way to keep my last name business wise to were i can still cash checks ect…?but also take his last name for everything in life besides my business?i cant have 2 different drivers lisence with 2 different last names can i lol,is there something i can do about keeping my name as is legally for just my business?
thanks so much for any advice and help you can give 🙂
oh if i change my name my middle will be blended in with my first,my last will become my middle.
i wouldnt mind the hypen last name,but i heard it causes problems with check cashing,credit card use ect….is this true?and would i have to sign both last names to checks and everything else if i hyphen them or can i just sign his last name?
my kids are 19 and 15 so i dont need to worry about how to change my name for any future children since we will not be having anymore 🙂
Post # 3
I would just keep your name. That’s what I did. I don’t know if there’s a way to maintain both of them.
Post # 4
I’ve seen posts around before about people who kept their name officially, but used their husband’s last name socially. However, if you are concerned about losing clients from word-of-mouth you should probably just keep your last name.
Post # 5
i kept my name, nothing changed, no problems, we’ve cashed checks by taking our marriage certificate to the bank.
Post # 6
You can call yourself whatever you like. There’s no legal requirement to take your husband’s name and it is quite common to use your own surname professionally but use your married name socially. However, while I don’t know the relevant law in the US certainly, you wouldn’t be able to have 2 driving licences in separate names here and certainly not two passports!
Post # 7
Socially, no one is going to know what your name is legally. I have a friend employed in the research field, who took on her married name only for social occasions. You can ask people to call you or address your mail to either last name 🙂
Post # 8
I am keeping my name, all my degrees are in that name and I am not changing it. There is no legal requirement to change your name. If it’s unique and you love it and Fiance doesn’t care, then why change it at all?
Post # 9
Go by his name socially and keep your name legally. Most married women get called Mrs. HisName whether they want to or not!
And, personally, I think at the age of 41 you shouldn’t be pressured to relinquish your maiden name.
Post # 10
@sharonmariep: I kept my name but I sign with his last name too so he likes it and when we call our friends I say Sofia… Hubby’s last name. I did my bar exam with my Dads name it would be a nightmare to change it. In my french Id that i have because of Him I took his last name.
Post # 11
@sharonmariep: just keep your last name. don’t change anything. you can still use his name socially.
i kept my last name. always have. i don’t get offended if someone calls me mrs. hislastname though.
Post # 12
thanks everyone.i guess ill just keep my name as is and use his socially.he has told me he doesnt mind or blame me for not wanting to take his last name,but i know he would love for me to take his and i know it will upset him when i dont change it,he will keep it to himself and not tell me though.it makes me feel bad because i would love to take his because i can still keep my last name by making it my middle name,but i just dont want to mess with my business right now,i have a hard time getting clients as it is living in my area,and word of mouth is what keeps me afloat right now.
i will plan to legally do it in a couple of years when we are finacially better off 🙂
Post # 13
thanks that a good idea.we had gotten a few check at our bridal shower(before we were even married lol)from his aunts and they put my first name but his last.
Post # 14
I legally made my surname my second middle. I was Lissa Rae Jackson and got married to Mr. Johnson, so now I am Lissa Rae Jackson Johnson. This is what my social security card and driver’s license says.
I decided to keep my last name professionally, so I still publish as Lissa Rae Jackson. I wanted my PhD diploma to be in my original name, the name I spent the most time working towards it with, so I never changed it at the university. So my university still knows me as Lissa Rae Jackson. Haven’t had an ounce of problem. My student ID still says that.
Also, I was really lazy and didn’t want to schlep my marriage certificate to the bank, and order new bank cards and all that. Every time I go, I forget to bring the damn certificate. Therefore, all my checks and bank cards still say Lissa Rae Jackson (except for new cards I’ve applied for after, that say Lissa Rae Johnson). I have never had a problem with it, even though sometimes I sign the bill “Lissa Jackson,” other times “Lissa Jackson Johnson” and sometimes just “Lissa Johnson.” I’ve been maried for almost a year. I also grabbed a gmail when it was still brand new and so I have just my name with no extra numbers. Although I also managed to get lissa.jackson.johnson, I thought that was too long to give people and it just redirects to lissa.jackson anyway, so I just kept it the same.
So basically, the only place I actually changed my name was with the SSA and DMV! LOL!
I suppose it helps that original last name and my new last name are just as similar to each other as Jackson and Johnson.
My biggest problem is keeping straight what name I’ve given to whom!
Post # 15
I was in a similar predicament. I’m an attorney and have my own practice. I kind of felt like my maiden name did all of the hard work to earn my certification and should be the name on the shingle.
I always wanted to take my husband’s last name, because of tradition and not wanting to have a different name than my future children/husband. In the end, I took my husband’s name and I plan to change the name of my firm to my husband’s last name. One of the reasons is that my pastor once told us that our lives should be so interwoven and together that divorce is not an option and people shouldn’t be able to tell where one begins and the other ends.
With that said, I don’t think that I should be known one way personally and professionally (unless perhaps I was some award winning actress –which I’m not). I am my husband’s wife and will carry his name wherever I go.
Post # 16
My SO wants to take my name – his idea, not mine!