Post # 1
Ok so my FI’s best friend/best man is married to a BITCH! I haven’t cared 2 cent for her the first moment we met. Well I tried to play nice and for the sake of my Fiance agreed to put on a smile and hang out with them. Well 2 years later and SEVERAL arguments later I dare her to look at me. Well now my Fiance is without a best man because she is not “allowing” him to be in the wedding anymore. I told my Fiance since he is not longer in the wedding then they are to not show up at the wedding either. However I have a bad feeling she is going to show up anyway. She has already crashed a mutual friends wedding by showing up and her reception was spent trying to keep the bridesmaids from killing her. That is not going to happen at the my wedding. I don’t want to look like I am such an evil person when I kick her out when she shows up but what am i supposed to do?
Post # 3
post a guard (show them photos if they’re unfamiliar with how she looks) and tell them to remove her from the premises if she shows up.
Post # 4
Have your Fiance talk to his friend and make sure that they don’t go. Make it clear that she is not, under any circumstances, still invited, and that the other groomsmen will have to be watching out for her. His friend hopefully can talk the crazy wife out of crashing!
Post # 5
- Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA
Just like assigning a babysitter to a drunk to ensure they don’t embarass themselves or others at a wedding– get someone to prevent her from doing the same.
Post # 6
I can’t believe this guy just let his wife tell him what to do. That would be the day! But seriously I am worried about the same thing, but its my stepdad, so I am just having security through the person out if they show up.
Post # 7
I meant throw the person out.
Post # 8
You should warn the venue not to let them in if they show up. For sure.
Post # 9
@alleycat1984: Exactly! He does EVERYTHING his wife tells him to do! down to who his friends are!
Since our wedding will be small everyone knows who she is and every one knows she isn’t invited. So hopefully she won’t be able to get out of her car!
It’s just sad I have to worry about her crashing our wedding instead of thinking about the most anticipated day of my life and being excited!
Post # 10
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
Assign someone the responsibility of dealing with her if she shows up and make sure the venue is aware of it because they may be able to help. You should be able to have her trespassed by the police if she is not invited and asked to leave but refuses to do so. Just make sure you have someone else to deal with it so you can enjoy your day.
Post # 11
Have your Fi speak to them, make it clear they aren’t welcome and the venue has been warned ahead of time, let them know if they choose to show up and trespass they will be escorted off the property.
Post # 12
I agree with PP’s that you should talk to the staff at your venue and make sure that they know she is not allowed in. Make sure you give them a photo. That’s what they’re there for…to handle these things for you and make sure you can enjoy yourself instead of worrying!
If you don’t have staff at your venue, then definitely tag one or two people you trust to be on alert for her that can turn her away, preferably larger men who can be more intimidating. You can instruct them to say that they are not part of the final headcount, and therefore there are no seats or food for them.
Post # 13
Yes, you are allowed to ask someone to leave if they show up and are not on your guest list.
Post # 14
I had a friend tell me that her friend is getting married in the port on a cruise ship. They check your ID (and something else I can’t remember) before you can board the ship, just as protocol. I thought it was a GENIUS way to keep unwanted guests away! Haha!
Post # 15
That sucks. I lost my best friend this way. But stand your ground. You didn’t pay all that money just to have all your memories of that day be of HER. That’s not how you want to remember marrying the love of your life!
Post # 16
Does your Fiance want him at the wedding? Because if he does, I say deal with it and let him have his Best Friend there, regardless of the reason why he cannot be in the wedding.
i guess it also depends if they are invited or not. I would assume if I wasn’t in a wedding anymore that I would still be invited but who knows. I sent invitations to my wedding party so technically they and their SO/date is invited whether they drop out of my wedding party or not.