(Closed) Can I request an RSVP by 6 weeks before my wedding date?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: When should I ask for an RSVP for a Dec. 1 wedding?
    anytime you want : (58 votes)
    72 %
    don't ask for earlier than early-mid November : (23 votes)
    28 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2702 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I don’t think it’s a problem. But I think you should send your invites a couple of weeks earlier to give them more time. I think an RSVP time of 6 weeks before the deadline is fine.

    Post # 4
    Member
    2849 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    What is your reasoning for needing the RSVP so early? I wouldn’t suggest having the RSVP due any earlier than a month in advance. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    97 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    my wedding date is sept 29th and my rsvp date is aug 15th so i say go for it but im also not one for following all the wedding rules that are out there.

    Post # 7
    Member
    1086 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    We are not marrying until April 2013 but sending out the invites (since we have family and friends completely across the country) within the next 4-6 weeks. We are putting the RSVP date over 4 months before the wedding, we have to to know how many and what we will need as we are inviting about 100 people and their families which are about 3-5 people per family, we need the numbers, I think as long as you give them enough advanced notice, they can do the same for you. But to send out the invites and say RSVP by next week or even next month probably wouldn’t be a good idea

    Post # 8
    Member
    2104 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    If it’s a Destination Wedding and people will have to have their trip booked by 6 weeks in advance (like bees having their weddings in Jamaica, Cayman, etc have mentioned) then I think it’s fine.  But if people aren’t traveling out of the country, then it might be a little early and if people are forced to give an answer, you might get more declines.  I think a lot of people don’t always know that far ahead if they’ll have that time off work, will have a babysitter secured, and domestic airfare tends to be at it’s best when you’re booking right at 6 weeks ahead of time so those flying in might not have definite airfare secured.

    Post # 11
    Member
    57 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I’m going to asking for an RSVP 6 weeks before as well. We have to have final counts to our vendors 1 month out, and so that gives me two weeks for late responders and tracking down missing RSVPs. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    550 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    My RSVP date is July 7th and invites were mailed today.  My room block expires June 18th which is why I wanted to make sure I had them in the mail by June 1st. It gives people a month to nail down travel arangements, time off work, sitters and whatever else they may need. I also believe in padding my “need by date”, most people on this list won’t send it back on time! They’ll probably be a week or two late if I even get it back at all.

    I also sent Save the Dates if that makes any difference.

    Post # 13
    Member
    274 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Absolutely I plan On having RSVP’s due by 2 months in avance so that we could also invite more people if we dont have enough coming.

     

    Our venue also has a min. of 125 Guests so I would also hate to pay for 125 and not have that many show up. 🙂

    Post # 14
    Member
    2104 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @violet25:  lol, I guess I didn’t need to make my point now that you got that invite!  ;o)  I totally understand why you want to make it early… it’s a tough game to make it convenient for the guests as well as yourself.  There will be some people who decline early anyway and for each of those you can send and invite to someone on your B list. Is your B list huge?  If not, it might be easier to just make the RSVP date 4 weeks ahead and send new invites as declines come in.

    Post # 15
    Member
    2699 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @violet25:  Think that’s absolutely fine 🙂

    Post # 16
    Member
    853 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    For a June 21 wedding, I sent invites at the end of March (nearly 3 months before the wedding), RSVP date April 15. There was no way I could wait – the plans depend on the number of guests! We didn’t do Save-The-Date Cards, since our engagement was short. Send them when you want. If you have out of town guests, they’ll appreciate having all the details early.

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