(Closed) Can I throw myself an Engagement Party?

posted 8 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
460 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Throw yourself one at a local bar or pub… Invite everyone you know to celibrate, and make some friends by inviting the people there to celebrate with you…

Being engaged is cause for a celibration…


Post # 4
225 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I was thinking of throwing myself one some time during the winter. We are getting married in NY but we wanted to have some sort of celebration in Florida for our co-workers so we going to make our own little one in a restaurant.

Post # 5
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

sorry, but i say no. it looks like a gift grab. ask someone to host it for you if no one has offered, but don’t host it yourself.

Post # 6
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

I think if you do it right it won’t look like a gift grab. If you host it at the local pub, I doubt people will think to bring a gift. You can also spread it around by word of mouth that you just want to celebrate with friends and that you don’t expect presents. I think it’ll be fine! 🙂

Post # 7
971 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

If you want to do it without it looking like a gift grab, this is what you do … invite your friends to meet you at a bar via email, text message, word of mouth.  OR say that you’re just having a small party at your house on whatever date and can you pleaes come.  Again, invite by email, text, word of mouth.  Do NOT tell them why you are having this party — just make it seem like it’s a casual event to unwind.  With the holidays coming up, you could make it seem like it’s a pre-holiday warm up.  Just do NOT mention that it’s for an engagement.  Just make it a big “I want to have fun” event.  Then, once everyone is there, you can thank everyone for coming, let them know that you invited them because they are special to you and then you can announce your engagement.  That way, people haven’t brought gifts with them and it doesn’t look like a gift grab.  

To throw your own party where you specify it’s to celebrate your engagement seems like a gift grab.  If your intention is to get gifts more than announce the engagement, then get someone to throw you a party.   

Post # 12
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I dont think it looks like a gift grab at all. We actually hosted a BBQ the weekend after we got engaged to celebrate with friends and family. We didnt call it an engagement party – we just said we were having a BBQ and some people brought gifts but we definitely did not expect that! We just wanted to have a time to celebrate with family and friends and we didnt want someone else to have to pay for it! We got catering from a local BBQ place and had beer and spiked punch for people.

Post # 13
14183 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I think it depends how it’s done. We hosted a welcome home/engagement party/housewarming at our own home (i know, for shame–it was all kinds of stuff rolled together). It was also the first time our families would meet and we really wanted to just get everyone together BEFORE the wedding actually took place. We BBQ’d steaks, chicken, and burgers and made sangria and our friends brought desserts. We got some plants and bottles of wine as gifts, but not a soul thought they were supposed to bring an engagement gift (which is good–we didn’t expect any). Well, my Mother-In-Law gave us toasting flues =]. We did get some congrats cards. It was super casual and lots of fun. 

Post # 14
1871 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I think it’s fine, but yes, you do risk it looking like a gift-grab to some people, even if that’s not your intent.

My friend hosted her own for similar reasons as you and she wrote on the invitation “no gifts please” at the bottom. I’ve seen the line also for certain baby showers and other occasions that the couple doesn’t want any gifts. So something else you could do.

Post # 15
660 posts
Busy bee

We just did ours, AT OUR HOME, we invited CLOSE people ONLY and did not care what people thought of it! Hardly any gifts were brought, a few cards maybe and some bottles! But my friends were awesome and baked cakes, took the photogrpahs, we LOVED IT 🙂 Esp since we are expats living so far from family…..I think there is absolutly NOTHING wrong with it, go for it.

Post # 16
554 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I think it’s ok, we hosted our own last weekend. Here (at least among our circle) it’s fine for people to throw their own e-party. We booked a private room at a local pub, paid for finger food platters for 60ppl, my mum shouted us the cake.

We were very adamant with our friends & family that we weren’t interested in presents (we’ve lived together a while and have most everything) but people are generous & still bought things.

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