Post # 1
Okay, here’s my scoop…
I was married once when I was 23 to a great guy. We had a HUGE wedding, 7 bridesmaids, 400+ guest…the whole shubang! Unfortunatly after only 3 short years of marriage, he died in 2007 after a tragic accident. I never thought that I would ever find anyone who could make me happy again. However, God is Faithful, and has restored my happiness – and given me a second chance at true love.
My fiance and I will be getting hitched on April 23rd, 2010. We are having a SUPER small wedding, outdoors with only about 25 of our closest friends & family. THis is his first wedding but he really wants it small – he even mentioned running away. We’ve decided to have an actual ceremony and I have a black formal dress that I LOVE. I wore as a maid of honor in my bff’s wedding this past fall. It looks really great on me, and I like the way it fits. Here’s my question: Is it unacceptable for me to wear a black formal dress for my wedding? My mother seems to think that it might be too dreary and be like “the widow is getting married” I’m hoping for more of a breathtaking elegance…
Post # 3
Do you have a picture of yourself in the dress? Are there any flower details or something like that?
Unfortunately, without seeing the dress, I’m going to have to agree with your mother. You don’t have to wear white, but I don’t think black would be the right color for the occasion.
Post # 4
If you wear the black dress, you are sure to get a few comments and questions about why you chose to where it. It is your wedding and you can wear whatever you would like to; however, I would have to agree with your mom on this one. Sorry.
Post # 5
I agree with your mother 100%. It’s bringing that connotation to your wedding, whether you mean it to or not. You can wear it to the rehearsal dinner if you’re doing one, or some sort of afterparty. Or a nice dinner. Not your wedding.
Post # 6
I think you can wear whatever you want on your wedding day. But i also agree with your mother, 1. you have worn the dress before maybe find another dress in that similar style, and another colour besides black.
Show us a pic.
Post # 7
Sorry, I’m going to have to agree with your mom and PPs on this one. Could you find a dress in a similar style in a different color? I don’t think you need to wear white, but in this situation, I don’t think black is the right choice.
Post # 8
I agree with mom no matter how to dress looks. As a guest, I would absolutely think about your tragic past and wonder why you would choose to wear such a dark color on a day that is supposed to be so happy. I feel that it’s insulting in some ways to your Fiance as well. I say it”s a big fat NO. I’m sorry, I bet it’s a great dress! There’s always a more appropriate event to wear a black dress to though…
Post # 9
A colorful dress would be great, and though I’m a big fan of black wedding dresses in some cases, in this one it might take on additional unintended meaning.
Post # 10
I have to agree with DG, even though I really want to say that it’s a great idea! Because, well, it IS a great idea, and I love it… but I’d be afraid it would take on ‘an unintended meaning’ (exactly like she said; DG, you’re so smart!). 🙁
Post # 11
- Wedding: May 2010 - Philippe Park
Hmm, unfortunately, I would also think of it as “the widow is getting married” 🙁 Since you love the style/fit of the dress so much, maybe see about finding it (or getting it made) in a different colors?
Post # 12
Wear whatever you want that makes you happy. As far as black goes, for any other event, it’s considered a festive color and not funereal in the least. Also, if it was as morbid as people claim, it wouldn’t be the most popular bridesmaid dress color, for the fact that it is flattering on everyone compared to other colors. Some women cannot wear white, ivory or any other pastel either because it doens’t look good on them. You never ever hear anything about a “little black dress” being morbid for anything as it is expected to be worn at special occasions.
The thing I don’t understand that no one to date has been able to answer is why is black perfectly acceptable and expected for black tie parties and bridesmaids, but if a woman wants to wear it as a guest or a bride, then she’s flaunting the fact that she’s in mourning while everyone else in that same color is happy? If that was true, then why does no one ever mention the fact that men’s tuxes are 99.9% black? Shouldn’t that mean they’re attending a funeral instead of a wedding as well? See why that double standard makes no sense?
Black wedding dresses are worn in Europe without anyone batting an eye and no one there says anything about them being morbid. The only thing that matters is that you love the dress and feel beautiful in it.
Post # 13
- Wedding: September 2010 - Heron Hill Winery
I wonder if there is anyway you can brighten the look up….I would worry that guests may get the wrong impression…I have seen some black wedding dresses with white detail that are stunning perhaps you could go that route…I don’t think you have to wear white to be a bride.
maybe something like this:
Post # 14
can you put a colored shrug or jacket on with it in a cream or white color to make it brighter?
Post # 15
You could have a colorful bouquet of your choice.
Post # 16
- Wedding: September 2009 - Barr Mansion
I think it’s totally fine! Especially if it’s a small, not too formal affair. I’m assuming everyone who is there will be people who 100% love and support you and support all of your choices. I say go for it!