Post # 1
Our wedding is over, but my family (mom and sisters) want to throw me a shower a couple of months later.
It’s sort of a complicated situation as to why I didn’t have a shower before the wedding. I’m from Canada but have been living in the US with my now husband the whole time we were engaged. I couldn’t go back to Canada at all until after we were married and my green card application is approved. It wouldn’t have been possible for all my friends and family to come to the US for my wedding shower, so my family suggested that we have it after the wedding once I can return to Canada.
I know it’s not proper etiquette, but because of my circumstances I think it would be ok for them to throw me a shower after the wedding. My family has already asked some of my friends and they’re all for the idea.
What do you think.. would this be too weird?
Post # 3
Of course – it would be fine! You have a legit reason for not being able to have one beforehand. My best friend had a baby shower after the baby was born (she was a premie!) so why not a wedding shower after the wedding?! The sentament is the same… these people love you and want to shower you with that love. Enjoy it!
Post # 4
If that’s what works for you, then do it! There are no set in stone rules/times for weddings anymore! And, I’m sure everyone will understand.
Post # 5
It’s not a shower if it’s held after the wedding. You can have a housewarming party but that is a completely different environment and the rules of etiquette for a shower don’t apply in that case.
Post # 6
I think that’s a great idea considering your situation! And personally, I would throw caution to the wind about about etiquette. If you want to call it a shower, call it a shower. Since you didn’t have one, you’re entitled!!!!!! Have fun!
Post # 7
If I wasn’t your very good friend and didn’t know your situation well I would be put off by it!
But I think it will be OK if you invite only close friends and family who know your situation very well!
Post # 8
I have been to a bridal shower that was held after the wedding. I don’t know the reason why they waited until after the wedding to have the shower, they did have a small destination wedding, so maybe that had something to do with it… but I went and we had a great time, we just didn’t do any “bridal shower” games, it was a lovely lunch. I wasn’t put off at all, b/c she didnt’ have one before the wedding and every bride deserves her day!
Post # 9
I would call this a housewarming party where people get you things for your house (just like a wedding shower). It’s not a shower (nor proper to call it a shower for any reason) if you’re already married.
Post # 10
I think the “shower” part throws me. Maybe just call it your “Canadian reception”?
Post # 12
I don’t understand the hang up on the word “shower”. The point of the gathering is for friends and family to shower the person with their love and support (in their presence, and their presents). I personally wouldn’t call it a “bridal” shower. Perhaps a wedding shower? It would be great to have a wedding shower and have both men/women together for a reception celebration! I’m having a surprise wedding, and am trying to figure out the “shower” timing as well. I wouldn’t be offended in the least to attend your post-wedding shower!
Post # 13
I’d call it something else. If I was invited to a “shower” after the wedding and I wasn’t your best friend I would find it odd. I like the “house-warming” party idea like a PP said.
Post # 14
Also if I was being invited to an after the wedding shower that means I probably already gave you a pretty awesome wedding gift since I didn’t have to spring for two. I’d be irritated.