(Closed) can names be ‘taken’?

posted 10 years ago in Babies
Post # 32
Member
1870 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

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@MissHelen: I was wondering the same thing because my friend and I both love the same name: Alex. (Alexander; but it’s Alex we love). She had her baby, Alex and even though I’m not preggers, I did sort of confess it was also the right name for me. She responded: “Oh well. It’s ‘Alex,’ not ‘Tarquique.’ If we have two Alexes growing up together, I’m okay with it. Not the last Alex he’s gonna meet in his life–might as well have the first be yours!” Later on, she confessed that after her son was born, in a sense there weren’t any other Alexes as far as she was concerned, if you now what I mean. William is a very common choice these days; if you really like it, maybe you can gingerly ask?

Post # 33
Member
91 posts
Worker bee

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@7SEVENJ9: oh hell no I would never say anything… I would just whine to my husband and maybe some other close friends, but no one that would know them. I think it’s ok to be bummed but not make it too public, ya know?

Post # 34
Member
541 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

My sisters and I have unspoken rules about that. It goes for other things such as, I called dibs on pearls for my wedding while my sister was planning hers! Yes, I’m evil, I know. But she didn’t get mad she just decided okay, if justeen is doing pearls, I’ll do sparkle. No fighting, no jealousy. As for the baby-naming goes, she and my Brother-In-Law have gone the opposite direction. Instead of voicing their favorites in case no one else takes it, they are completely keeping quiet about it because they are afraid of influences and reactions that would deter them from choosing a name they want.

Post # 35
Member
9026 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Haha it is weird but names kinda can get “taken”. If my bestfriend chooses a name that I was thinking of, I cant really use the same name as her, cos that will be weird. Hopefully by the time I’m TTC i will have lots of great ideas that arent over used in my circle of friends

Post # 36
Member
149 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I probably wouldn’t use a name that was used by a family member or very close friend. The only gray area, I think, is kids of cousins- they would be second cousins so I’m not sure about that. Either way though I don’t think you can call dibs on a name…

Post # 37
Member
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

I’ve never thought much about this, as it hasn’t ever come up with friends/family. Unless it were a sibling’s child, I wouldn’t care much about whether we were using the same name as a friend or cousin if it is a name we really want to use! Luckily, his brother isn’t even married yet, so we’ll be the first to have children and none of our friends are pregnant now, so we should be the next to have children. I wouldn’t care if somebody we are close to used the same name as us. I don’t consider it stealing-I would just think they really wanted to use that name, too!

Post # 38
Member
1025 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

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@rugulach:I agree. I think 2nd cousins is about where the lines are. I wouldn’t do it, just cause I wouldn’t listen to my mom say “But that’s what your cousin named her daughter!” 

Post # 39
Member
1535 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

We have a name held for our first born son. Everyone in my family and all of my close friends know not to dare take it. I’m not pregnant yet and won’t be for a little while, but for us the name is really important. It’s a family name and also the name of my twin brother who died as an infant.

We ran into a problem last year when a friend of a friend named her son our name. It bothered me because she specifically asked me if I had any picked out baby names and begged me to tell her. Once I did…bang! she named HER son that. It kind of stung my feelings a little, but when it comes down to it I’m not going to loose any sleep over it.

The Kid Carson Show (radio station) in Vancouver always jokes about “baby name theifs” they even have a little song about it.

Post # 40
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I honestly wouldn’t care who else used the name. If I want to name my child a certain name, I’m going for it.

The good thing is that neither girl name either my husband or I picked out is even close to being common. Yuuki will probably be the only one in her class unless it shoots up in popularity.

The boy name I have is very common, but I’ve had it in mind for years, and nobody, not even my best friend (just an example, she named her son something different), is stopping me from using it.

I know the names that my SIL (brother’s wife) has in mind for when they have kids. None of them are names I even considered.

Post # 41
Member
2286 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

@JennyW1: Haha, we just had the conversation. If it’s a boy, he’s going to go by “Liam”, which means we could have a Will and a Liam which I think is adorable!

Post # 42
Member
654 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

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@ecomaha: This is my problem. We’re expecting and if its a girl we’re going to name the baby Libby Jane which is DH’s grandma’s first name and my grandma’s first name. Two of DH’s cousins have Libby as their middle name in honor of the same grandma. We really love the name and we’ve heard a few comments about oh that makes the third time its been used etc but my theory is if they wanted it so bad they woulda used it as a first name. In my situation I think middle names shouldn’t ever be off limits. For you I think it would be fine since there is a age difference and you guys don’t see each other often.

Post # 43
Member
703 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

A friend’s Future Brother-In-Law just had a son and gave him his father’s middle name.  That would be fine if it wasn’t also her FI’s middle name!  And the rest of the family will get mad if my friend and her Fiance pass the name down to their future son.

Post # 44
Member
3448 posts
Sugar bee

Ok, I’m just gonna pop in here. I am NO WHERE near TTC. However, I have a cousin (male) who has 3 kids: 2 girls, 1 boy. His wife saw me and couldn’t remember if I was Sarah (my sister) or Meredith (me). When I told her Meredith she said: (not drunk, totally serious) oh, you’re the reason we can’t name any of our girls Meredith.

Moving on from awkward moment: I am NOT close with this cousin, like I haven’t seen him in like 4 years, never have met his childern, don’t correspond during holiday’s, etc. Apparently the reason is because he used to babysit for my sister and I when we were younger and he just has it stuck in his head that he can’t name his girls Meredith.

Not to sound like I don’t talk to my cousin, this is how we’re related: my aunt’s husband’s brother’s son. so basically just by marriage.

Edit: to answer the question: I think it’d be alright if they would name a daughter Meredith because we are not close at all. Biological sisters: no, fraternal sisters: ok (not ideal), close friends: no, not close friends: ok (again, not ideal), acquaintances: coincidence.

Post # 45
Member
601 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010 - Heinz Chapel Ceremony, Museum Reception

I think they sort of can. For example, my sister’s favorite baby boy name is Elliott. When she told me that, I thought, “wow, that IS a really cute name…” but since I’m married and she’s single, I think it really would be like I was stealing that name out from under her nose. Also, my favorite baby girl name was Charlotte for a very long time, but then my BFF named her baby girl Scarlett, and the similarity made Charlotte lose some appeal for me.

On the other hand, there are about a billion women with the first or middle name Nora on my mom’s side–the repetition hasn’t stopped anyone yet!

Post # 46
Member
648 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I will admit this has bothered me before. We have a 4 year old that we named Kaia, not a common name in our area at all, in fact I’ve never met another one. We wanted something different because I grew up with at least 5 other girls who have the same name as me. No problems until this summer.

FI’s cousin, who we see quite often because they have a 5 year old, had a baby and named her Maia. It’s not the same, but FI’s family are the kind of dorks (I say this lovingly) that will be like “well, now we have a Kaia and a Maia!” Even FI’s mother said it was weird they picked something so similar.

While this may seem childish, I feel like some of the “specialness” of our daughter’s name is now gone. And I, honestly, wouldn’t have a problem if my daughter were older or if they used her middle name. I think it also bothers me because I know no one in my family would do this, they know better. So yeah, I feel like a name is taken if someone in the family already has it. I call my daughter Miss Renee when we are around them now (I’ve called her this at home for years).

On the other hand, I worked with a lady who had a grandson the same age as our girl and his name was Kai, which I thought was too cute! Hopefully that means I’m not completely irrational. 🙂

Edit: I wanted to clarify, when I said: So yeah, I feel like a name is taken if someone in the family already has it. That doesn’t apply to families who decide to pass down names, like a grandmother, grandfather, or parent’s name. I just feel weird when two kids in the same family have the same or a similar name.

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