Post # 1
I am 56 and will be getting married for the second time. I am marrying my first love after being reunited 40 years from our parting. He has been married two times before, but was always deep down in love with me. I was in an abusive marriage, husband alcoholic, cheated. After raising and protecting my two sons I finally found the courage to leave. So…….his family is welcoming and seem happy for us. My two sons don’t want to be involved because my ex will probably have a stroke when he finds out and they don’t want to deal with it. I divorced my husband but somehow he got my family. My sister has him to her house for dinners, but has not met my Fiance after a year and a half. My other sister is a widow, has been quite ill and has not even mentioned by upcoming marriage. We are having a Destination Wedding with just the two of us. I am trying to understand all of their viewpoints but I am kind of starting to feel sad that I am doing everything myself. I recently moved to another state to be with my Fiance so I don’t have friends close. I feel like I divorced my husband and yet he still has a thumb on my new happy life because he can’t or won’t move in. Am I unreasonable?
Post # 3
If they won’t be happy for you, be happy for yourself. This is your wedding and should be a time of happiness for yourself and your husband to be. Congratulations!
Post # 4
Post # 5
It could happen to anyone..i find it lovely the fact that you reunited with your first love!! How romantic is that???? Do what your heart tells you to and others will see your happyness. Congratulations!!!
Post # 6
I agree with everything armychica0 said.
Also, Cogratulations to you and your soon-to-be-husband.
Post # 7
I’ll celebrate with you! I’m sure many of the Bees will, in fact. Congratulations, and big hugs for getting away from your ex and finding real love. 😀
Post # 8
I’m super happy for you! It always cheers me up when people find “the one”, especially later in life after you’ve gone through some rough things.
That being said, this is one of the major downsides to eloping by yourselves. If your family isn’t involved or even at the wedding you can’t really expect them to be very into it. They may even feel left out that they aren’t invited. This doesn’t mean you need to change any of your plans, just try to see it through their eyes. If you want your fiance to get to know your family I think you need to initiate it. Maybe invite them out to visit you guys. Or go home for the holidays and make a point to spend time with all your relatives and introduce them to your new man. It doesn’t sound like any of them are being purposefully mean, but your ex was a part of their lives and you can’t really ask them to give that up. You can ask them to get to know your fiance.
Post # 9
I’m happy for you 🙂 Sounds like you’ve been through a lot but you’re finally getting a pretty happy ending by reuniting with your first love (which is sooooo sweet!) I know there are all these other horrible issues going on but I for one am happy for you, even though I’m a total stranger in another country 🙂
Post # 10
I’m happy for you too. Don’t be sad. You have every reason to be happy. Congrats!
Post # 11
Thanks for the encouragement and well wishes! It helps alot. Most of the time I try not to let I get to me but there are days it does.
We actually are going to have a courthouse ceremony here first for financial reasons (we are paying private health insurance for me) very soon. My sons have both met my fiancee and do like him. We tried to have them and my fiancé’s son with us for the courthouse ceremony as well as my sister. My sons were both extremely reluctant to even attend and be put into a position of lying to their Dad. So that is the reason we are doing the courthouse ceremony alone, to save them the stress.
As for my sister, I have tried on numerous occasions and talked to her about meeting fiancé. I always get an excuse. After I left my husband, I lived in an apartment alone for a year. I hired a mover and did everything myself. I was the cold hearted bitch who left my poor ex. No one except by Fiance and some friends ever saw my apartment. I kept the address secret from my ex. When he found out about my Fiance who he knows, I got a horrible phone call and then 24 voice mails in less than twelve hours. My sister knows all this and everything else that happened throughout the years.
I feel like I have been more than accommodating and understand their points of view. I am getting my happy ending and yet I would like to be part of MY family with my Fiance and I am also dreading the fallout when he finds out.
My love story is like a movie. I met my Fiance when I was thirteen!!! We were dating for almost two years. Gosh my parents were so liberal. We and my ex had the same circle of friends. I broke up with my Fiance after he went into the military; it was the Vietnam era. I never forgot him and always wanted to apologize for my cruel breakup. Two years agp his brother came into the medical office where I worked. I talked to him about it and gave him my business card with email and phone number. About two months later I received an email from him. After many emails and phone conversations, it was clear to us that we never stopped loving each other though we had not seen or spoken for over forty years. We met in a park one time before I left my husband. It truly is a miracle and I want to share my happiness. That’s my story.
Post # 12
I am happy for you! Don’t be sad!
Post # 13
Congradulations! I’m so sorry you aren’t getting the support you deserve. BUT its fantastic that you’ve been reunited with the love of your life!
Post # 14
@Pamelor55: Well I’m happy for you! Congrats on your marriage!!! I hope you have many wonderful years together. The ex can GTFO it.
Post # 15
congrats! it’s wonderful that you can finally be with with your first love! you have to do what makes you happy.
Post # 16
We’ll be happy for you. The rest of them can take a long walk off of a short pier.
Congrats on finding your happiness, and don’t let anyone take it away from you.