(Closed) Can someone help explain STD and invitation timelines for a DW?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
162 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I sent my destination wedding save the dates eight months before the wedding. I should have sent them a month or two sooner. I’m just getting the rest of my invites sent out, and we have 5 weeks until the wedding. I’m pretty late on those – they probably should have gone out 2.5 months beforehand.

It sounds like you’re probably going to want to send the STD’s out as soon as possible. I included hotel information (including wedding blocks,) the URL for our wedding website, and I think maybe a couple of important travel tips. I don’t think it hurts to include more info, such as attractions, but it might be a little overkill. And, if you haven’t had time to research everything yet, you might prematurely stress yourself out! If I were being invited to a wedding halfway across the globe, I’d want to know 1. when the wedding is, 2. how to get there (recommended airlines/airports/etc.?) 3. where to stay, and 4. an idea of how long I should plan on being in town. 

Just my thoughts. 🙂 Etiquette-wise, I’m not sure what the right answer is.

Post # 4
1573 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I am not a Destination Wedding bride but I have a few ideas for you.  

Start a website. Put all the information you just mentioned on the website. Ex: hotels, costs, attractions etc. You could even have people start rsvping.  You can send out the save the date card with the wedding info: date, place and your website. (Send out the STD as soon as possible to give your guests time to start planning and, possibly, saving.) Then send out the invites about 3 months before the wedding.  You would still need to send a invite to everyone that you sent a STD to.

Hope this helps.

Post # 5
83 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

We sent out a STD 8 months before our destination wedding.  It had the date, the city and our website link.  On the website, we had lots of info on hotels, flights, ground transportation recommendations and information about the destination.  We did online RSVP, so we had the feature activated as soon as each aspect of the wedding weekend was finalized.  Some people RSVPed early, but we didn’t put any info asking people to RSVP until we sent out the final invitation.

We sent invitations to everyone who got an STD, even those people who told us after getting the STD that they couldn’t come to the wedding.  (I think that’s one of the etiquette “rules” but also practically you never know if people might change their mind later or their plans might change.)  We sent the invitations out about 3 months in advance, asked for RSVP a little less than 2 months in advance if I remember correctly.  We figured that anyone who was going to go would need to fly and make arrangements (no one was local… and our hotel blocks were expiring a week or so before that), so people would probably know by then if they were coming.

Agree with the previous comments – the most important things to let people know early are the date, the place, where to stay and how to get there.  Having a website with all the info is an easy way to do it (and minimize what you have to send out in the mail).

Post # 7
162 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I made one with Google Sites – it really wasn’t hard: http://sites.google.com/site/briantory/

You can even set up the bare bones site, send the STD out first, and the day after add content to the site if you want to focus on getting the STD’s out sooner. 

There are a TON of wedding vendors that offer free sites. TheKnot, for example. I bet a quick WeddingBee search would help you find a good wedding-specific one.

Post # 8
674 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m sending out Save-The-Date Cards a year in advance. We’re getting married in a country most people are not familiar with. It’s also such a popular tourist destination that the earlier people book, the cheaper it’s going to be for them.

On the STD itself, I’m just having names, city, and date, but since I’m doing electronic Save-The-Date Cards, I’m also including a pdf with all the info most people would put on a website (probably more because I’m giving people info on how to get there, where to stay, distances from airports to venue, how to get around, etc.).

After that, I’ll probably send the invitations out about 3 months in advance and allow RSVPs up to one month in advance (our venue is pretty relaxed about getting final numbers).

It probably seems like I’m doing everything too early, but I know that if it were me I’d want to know as soon as possible so as to get the best deal for flights/hotels/etc.

Post # 9
2532 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We sent out Save-The-Date Cards about 6.5 months before our wedding. We included a link to our website where people could find information about hotel blocks, area attractions and how to get to our wedding. Every month or so I updated with more things for people. We sent out our invitations 10 weeks before our wedding. and our RSVP by date is 5 weeks before our wedding. For us destination was still in the US but 95% of our guests (including us!) have to fly or drive over 5 hours to get to our wedding. If yours is in another country or a lot of people have to fly over seas then you may want to send out Save-The-Date Cards 8 months in advance (like SOON!) and then invitations 10-12 weeks in advance. Also, since people will be traveling to another country your website should include any important information they need to know. You may want to remind people to get a passport if needed.

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