Can someone please help me understand cats?

posted 1 week ago in Pets
Post # 2
1028 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2018 - UK

Yeah, this sounds like a pretty normal cat…

Ive had cats my whole life, and they’re basically my favourite thing in the world, but they can seriously be arseholes sometimes!

Dogs are pack animals, and you’re the leader of their pack, so they are always desperate to please you. Cats are independent creatures though, they have no incentive to do what you want because in their eyes, you’re not in charge. It’s actually one of the reasons I love cats – when they show affection, it’s on their terms, whereas dogs are needy and always want you to know they’re great. 

Basically, remember that the cat will always be the boss and will always call the shots on your relationship, and you’ll do fine!

PS, he really is a beautiful kitty!


Post # 3
1028 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2018 - UK

Oh, and just to illustrate my point, my cat has just walked in, sliced my leg open for no reason, and walked away without a second glance…

Post # 4
348 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2020

You have to earn a cat’s love, that’s why it’s so special when they deem you are worthy ๐Ÿ˜‚

Cats are tricky creatures and all their personalities are different. I have one who is a complete cuddle bug – loves to be picked up and insists on being held like a baby (he literally tips himself on his back) and my other cat sounds like yours – she runs a lot more hot and cold and does not like being picked up at all. She will play the stroke me/don’t stroke me game ๐Ÿ™„

My only tip with cats really is to let them guide you with how much affection/attention they want. When I was a kid we had cats and I made the mistake of treating them like dogs – giving them love/picking them up whenever it suited ME and they did not appreciate it. They didn’t like me and would lose patience & scratch me.

Now I’m older I let my cats give/receive affection on their terms – they are very lovable and have never scratched me once.

Your cat sounds like he’s flirting with you – rubbing on your leg then running away etc. It’s all a sign of affection in cat language and you’ll get used to it ๐Ÿ˜‚ ps. He is gorgeous.

This is my temperamental kitty:

Post # 7
1238 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - Turkey

 Haha. I don’t think there’s an explanation to what cats do, see a million cat memes. They never make sense. I’ve never had dogs or been around them really but it surprises me to hear they’re really that loyal. There’s no pressuring cats to do anything, because they’ll find a way out. They’ll eat what they want, sleep wherever, will wake you up in the middle of the night to play, or come massage your head. It’s really unpredictable with them, which I love. 

However, cats aren’t only independent. They show affection to the owner in soo many ways. It’s rewarding but probably different than how it is with dogs. 

Post # 8
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

Like PPs said, cats are more independent than dogs and human interactions with them needs to be on their terms. They like to have their own space – our 1 year old cat will take himself off into the next room to nap. If we carry him through to sit with us while we watch TV, he’s like nope! And will jump down and go back to the other room. And then 10 minutes later will come back and jump up for fuss- but this time its OK because HE decided to come over.


He does the “stroke me stroke me DON’T TOUCH ME!!!” act too… Such a diva. 

Post # 9
154 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Basically when it comes to humans…. Dogs are happy to go along for the ride but cats want to be the driver!

Post # 10
957 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
@sbl99:  I just wanted to say that your cat is beautiful!! What a floof! ๐Ÿ˜

Post # 11
4902 posts
Honey bee

As PP said, cats are very independent and when they want attention they want it on their terms.  While some cats will come sit on a lap or curl up beside someone when it’s naptime and that person is behaving in a way they approve of or rub up against your legs and have a good pet for a minute or two – they aren’t really approval seekers like dogs are.  They usually aren’t just super “affectionate” or attention whores in the way that dogs are where dogs are amenable to the constant attention/playing/petting whenever you feel like it.  Cats bestow their affection on you when they’re damn good and ready in the manner they want to do it.  Cats are loyal and affectionate and loving, but their mindset is different.  Dogs are all about you and your approval.  Cats are all about what humans can do for them.

That mindset is why even though I love dogs I just don’t think I’ll ever have one because they’re just so needy on the level of a toddler (but at least toddlers grow up to feed and toilet themselves eventually) and it’s…a lot.  Cats are more like teenagers – mostly fine hanging out in their room and grunting acknowledgment in your general direction until it’s mealtime with moments of affection peppered in when they deem you worthy.  I’ve known some cats to be needy, but usually they act more like royalty.  

Post # 12
913 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2019

What a BEAUTIFUL baby! I have a maine coon mix cat of my own, and they’re such a hoot. The sounds, the personalities, I love them!

First of all, every reputable study done shows that cats do have affection/love for their parents, so even if he’s acting like this, the overwhelming odds are that he’s bonded with you!

The best thing you can do to get your cat wanting to spend time with you is to play with them. One of those feathers on a stick, a laser pointer, they’re not fussy, just get something and play. He’ll spend more time around you that way, and it may translate to more cuddles.

With cats, it’s also a “be careful what you wish for.” My girl has zero concept of personal space. She follows me into the bathroom. Sleeps by my pillow. Regularly plops her 14 pound body on my chest/laptop with zero warning. It took her a little while to be THIS snuggly, so there’s hope!

Also, my favorite thing about Maine Coons is their extra-bitchy face. Even when mine is SO HAPPY she’s could die, and she’s purring so loudly the whole room can hear it, she looks like she’s about to murder someone. The contrast of your cat and dog (the dog looks SO SWEET) kills me. 

Unsolicited Maine Coon advice: don’t change their wet food suddenly if they have a sensitive stomach. Wrangling a cat the size of a small toddler to cut gross fur out of it’s butt is the worst. 

Post # 14
105 posts
Blushing bee

Totally normal cat behavior. ๐Ÿ™‚

I grew up with dogs only also.  When Fiance was just my boyfriend and I moved in with him he had a rescue cat.  First cat i’ve ever lived with.  It was certainly a change. haha. 

I had to learn about the acting like she wanted something and then not actually wanting it.  Her being a total B**** out of no where. I remember the first time she actually sat on my lap and I was SO HAPPY. 

GORGEOUS Kitty and Dog By The Way. :):)

Post # 15
8967 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I can’t offer advice but this is exactly why I have a dog and not a cat hahahaha

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