(Closed) Can they DO this?!

posted 8 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

If you have a contract then no they cannot do this to you for any reason.

Post # 4
Member
4520 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Wait–so you booked the venue first? And now she wants to push your time back for someone else? This is absolutely NOT ok. Whether the couple are on active duty or not should have nothing to do with it. You reserved the venue for a certain time, and the venue needs to honor that. What kind of agreement did you have with the venue? A contract? A deposit? I would not budge one inch on this. It’s extremely unprofessional, and you don’t have to accept it.

Post # 5
Member
1927 posts
Buzzing bee

Agreed if you have a contract stating the time then this is not an option for them.  I personally wouldn’t do it.  I would never wanted to have another couple using my church on the same day as me.  There are just too many issues that can come from that.  I’m sensitive to the fact that they are an active duty couple and maybe they need to get married on that date, but there are other places they can go. It’s not your responsibility to change your plans to accomodate them.

Post # 7
Member
2237 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Seriously…I would continue to try and reach her until you actually get ahold of her and explain that you have signed too many contracts other then the one with the ceremony venue to push it back and you’re expecting them to adhere to the contract that was signed months ago. 

Post # 8
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

They can’t do that. You’re only three months from your wedding, and you’ve probably had invitations printed, delivery times set-up with vendors, hours contracted with your photographer, etc. It’s way too much work to switch your time … by THREE hours no less.

I would tell these people that while you think it’s very nice they’re trying to accommodate another couple, it’s too late in the game for you to switch your plans, and the contract that both parties signed will remain in tact with no changes. Say you appreciate their cooperation and look forward to have your wedding there.

Be gracious first, and then if they keep pushing it, be, well … less gracious 🙂

Post # 9
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

As others have said yes they are on active duty (and God knows we are all grateful for those who are), but that doesn’t give them the right to push someone else who has a signed contract out the door.  They don’t HAVE to get married there they can go to the courthouse or another venue.  I seriously would NOT budge on this.  Things like this are why people get frustrated with “special favors” because of professional (not just military, but other professions as well) standing.  Good luck to you, I hope you stand your ground!

Post # 11
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

No, absolutely not. If they make you push back your time, they have to reimburse you for new invitations and any fees you may incur from other vendors. Just email/call the person in charge and say you signed a contract for that day and time and already booked all your vendors, so you unfortunately can’t move it.

Post # 12
Member
544 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

It sounds to me like it’s not the active duty couple’s fault – it’s the chaplain’s. You definitely need to get ahold of her ASAP and make it known that you cannot change your time, and if you do, she needs to refund you the cost of invitations, printing, and everything you’ve had done so far to announce the time you thought you had.

There is a contract that is legally binding. Remember – she can’t just change it without your permission, and no matter what, you have that to back you up.

(Ha, the poster above me just beat me to it with all this info!)

Post # 14
Member
948 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’m not sure if this can be applied to this issue, but if the base is active (ie a military community on it) active duty will always have priority no matter what. I know this sucks, but that’s how it is with most military services. At the hospital, at the pharmacy, at the px, no matter how many years you or your family put in before leaving or retiring. HOWEVER she should have explained this to you or check your contract to see if it’s in there. If it’s not then maybe you can argue it. It really sucks being sent to the back of the line now that I’m out and try to get services. But active duty military members are on a different timeline. Get a hold of her and see if there’s anything that can be done. And on a side issue I don’t think it’s okay to tell an active duty soldier to go to a court or civilian organization when the services are on that base for Active duty soldiers.

Post # 15
Member
931 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

So did you put down any sort of deposit for the chapel? I know you have a “contract”, but without consideration (meaning – without some sort of agreement to do something on your part, like the payment of $), your contract may not be as ironclad enforceable as you think it is. I agree that they should have to pay for the money you spent in reliance on their written promise (such as invitations, costs incurred from vendors etc.).

Also, is there any way to prove (or get them to admit in writing) that your contract was signed first?

Post # 16
Member
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

If you really don’t mind the thought of an evening wedding, see if you can get them to give you something – like, if you were paying, I’d say BIG discount, but since it’s free… maybe ask them for some kind of compensation? Free set up crew for the chapel maybe, since you won’t have time to do it yourself?

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