Post # 16
- Wedding: September 2016 - The White Barn
Good to know, I mainly asked because I saw someone in a facebook group that im a part of ask and some of the women who responded were against black at weddings, but just some. There were lots of others who thought it was just fine. Now that I think of it, I remember a few others besides my mom who wore black and not in protest haha. I’m still going to dress it up in a different color but I’m getting the dress and wearing it. I also wanna get this for my works Christmas party.
Post # 17
That old saw about wearing black means you hate one of the marriage partners is old and has to stop. For so many people, black is the only color they feel comfortable in, and adding colored shoes, jewelry, wraps, is unnecessary.
I went to a wedding years ago in a black dress, and my friend who was a reader also wore a black dress. Some might argue that is the reason the marriage barely lasted 2 years!
Post # 18
I wore a black sem-formal to my cousins evening January wedding. I thought I would be the oddball, but almost all the women were in some sort of fancy black dress.
Post # 19
DanaWeddingGuest : it’s definitely dying out, that’s why I think it’s important to know what the other guests think. Plenty of our friends, including one of our readers, wore black and it was fine because that is their style. My Mother-In-Law on the other hand NEVER wears black and it was well known that it took her some getting used to a non-Jewish DIL (she always liked me, it would have just been better if I were Jewish lol) so that’s why I thought it was best she avoid the color at our wedding. I did say “hey if that’s what you want my family to think then by all means wear black I’m not stopping you. But if you DON’T want them to think it then stick with your usual colorful self.”
Post # 20
Last wedding we went to had all four of us girls wearing a variation of LBD wrap dresses with either pearls or statement necklaces. It should be fine.
Post # 21
lulu_bell : Traditional etiquette maintains that it is improper to wear black, white, or red. Black, because it’s the color of mourning and casts a negative vibe. Red, because it’s too attention grabbing, and white because it “steals the bride’s thunder.” Not all cultures wear black to funerals in the first place. But, yes, there are people who still go by this, and who will give the side eye to guests in black. I find it’s more typical in the south and midwest than in big cities.
More liberal, contemporary etiquette, says that black is a fashion color, that the no black rule is outdated, and that it’s perfectly acceptable. FYI, it says the same thing about white as long as it’s not bridal looking.
Personally, I wear black to weddings all the time, but not head to toe black. It’s a very common thing to see at weddings in my area. My bag, jewelry, wrap and shoes will suggest a festive social occasion like a wedding. I’ll wear dark red, but not bright red. I won’t wear wear all white.
Post # 22
I would go for it! I’ve even seen weddings with bridesmaids in all black (and I think it looks elegent and lovely myself).
Post # 23
lulu_bell : yes! Totally okay, especially a winter wedding. I don’t see a problem with it!
Post # 24
lulu_bell : It used to be considered improper. I’m in my 40s and honestly was shocked the first time I saw someone wear a black dress to a wedding. It was about 10 years ago and I had never ever seen a black dress at a wedding before (except an edgy bride in a black wedding dress, but that’s different). At the time, I felt second-hand embarrassed for the young woman who obviously didn’t know any better, but now I’m embarassed at myself for being embarrased for her. Apparently she was at the front edge of a trend because now I see black at weddings all the time, on young women and older ones. So I’d say if it’s appropriate to the season, time of day, and formality of the event, it’s probably safe.
Post # 25
In my culture black or very dark colours (but especially black) is not for weddings, it would be seen as dressed for funeral instead of a happy celebration. For me personally even a black accessory like a shrug or fur bolero would stand out as “why are you wearing black” but I also understand internationally it’s not thought of this way and so I was not offended by those dressed in dark colours at my wedding.
Post # 26
- Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom
I come from a slightly superstitious family who always say “don’t wear black to a wedding, or red to a funeral.” I normally agree, but upon seeing your intended dress I think it’ll be ok 🙂
Post # 27
I wear black to weddings all the time! Weddings are a formal evening affair, so a little (or long&flowy) black dress is perfect in my eyes.
Post # 28
Yep! For years, my go-to wedding guest dress was a LBD. I sometimes paired it accessories like a metallic lace bolero, colorful shoes, etc. to lighten it up. I never had anything but compliments!
Post # 29
I say go for it! As long as it doesn’t have long sleeves and you wear a black veil lol then go for it. Plus it is slimming and goes with any other color.
Post # 30
I wear black to weddings all the time. And many people wore black to mine. No problem. I’m a new Yorker though so take that for what it’s worth. I’m sure it’s more acceptable in some areas than others. That said I went to a wedding in Kansas (second wedding for the bride) where the bride herself (a non-goth) wore black. I really don’t think it’s a big deal. But if you think no one else will be in black just make sure you’d still feel comfortable.