Post # 1
What is everyones thoughts on cancelling the wedding. Getting married by the Justice of the Peace and just having a casual party. This whole wedding thing is way expensive and ALOT of work. Doing it myself is really giving me a bad attitude. My wedding is Oct 13 2012. I was just thinking about just doing a celebration party instead and get hitched by the Justice of the Peace. The hard part is I have this AMAZING and BEAUTIFUL wedding gown that I wont be able to wear….
I need some opinions and thoughts from you ladies.. Im ready to give up on this stuff….
Post # 3
I love your idea. I wish I would have done just that. I’d say go for it AND wear your amazing wedding gown! You’re the bride, rock it!
Post # 4
I need some more information. Considering your wedding is 1 month away, what have you done already? What have you paid for and booked – and which of these deposits are nonrefundable? Have invitations been sent out? What are the additional costs that you have left? Etc… Maybe there are some options to cut some costs from hereon out? Or, maybe you haven’t done anything at all yet and invites havent gone out, in which case – do what makes you happiest!
Post # 5
Wear your amazing dress anyways! You are the bride you cant be over dressed!
Post # 6
Why won’t you be able to wear your amazing and beautiful wedding gown with the JP? You could still wear it! But if you feel you’re going into debt, I would try to scale it down a bit if you can first to see.
Post # 7
Have people already made travel arrangements? We have lots of people flying in and taking vacation time for the wedding. At this point, I would only cancel the wedding if no marriage was taking place. For me and my guests, it’s too late in the game to cancel all of these plans.
Can you find a cheaper venue and still have a more casual reception than originally planned? Parks, church halls, backyards, etc. would all be fine locations for a cake and punch reception.
Post # 8
@futuremrsk18: I was thinking this same thing!
Post # 9
Your wedding is just weeks away. I mean DAYS you can count. If you cancel now, will you get refunds for what you already have? A lot of what I have is not refundable if I cancel at that point. I’m doing all the decor, the flowers (paper), lanterns, etc and I understand how stressful it is. How about enlisting some help from family/friends?
I would not want you to regret having given up on your wedding just a month before the day and not get to see what you worked so hard for.
Post # 10
You’re so close though! I think you need to organize your thoughts and think about whether the time and energy and money you’ve already spent would be wasted and if you’re ok with that.
Ehat deposits have you given that would not be refunded? Do you have a lot of out of town guests that would lose their flights or would you just do a more scaled back version on the same day?
Maybe you can keep the basic bones of your wedding but just scale back a few things? I know I had a few things planned that I thoght were super important that as the day got nearer ended up on what I lovingly referred to as my “fuckit list”. Lets think about what exactly it is that’s bothering you and go from there.
Post # 11
I just wanted to say that if you have out of town guests who are flying in, be prepared for them to be extrememly upset with you if you cancel now. This happened to me a few years ago and I was sooo mad since we had just bought our plane tickets the day before and my Fiance had requested extra time off of work to make it. But they handled it extremely poorly, too. The only reason we even found out was because my Fiance messgaed the groom to let him know that we just bought our tickets and were excited for their big day! The response, ohhh yeah, we canceled it…. sorry, man. GAHH!
Post # 12
Just because your wedding is SO close, I would say don’t cancel. You will have a lot of upset guests who I’m sure have already made travel arrangements and also taken time off of school and work to share your day with you. Also, in terms of money, it makes no sense to cancel as surely none of the vendors will refund you your money.
Just take a few days off from the planning. Go with Fi to a hotel closeby or something and spend some time, just you guys. Take a deeeep breath hon, your wedding will be here VERY soon and I know you’ll regret not having everything that you’ve been working for! This is the homestretch, and you’re just about there. 🙂
Post # 13
One way to scale it down would be to just have a small ceremony,or go to the court house with close family and friends and just have a awesome reception, you could wear the dress for the reception and you can still celebrate.
You have to have a lot of time to D.I.Y , its taking me a 15 month engagement to get it all together because we are paying for the majority of it.
Post # 14
Can’t you just keep your existing wedding date & dress and make it more of a casual affair? Still wear your dress, etc. But just don’t bother with the details/formalities that may be stressing you out right now (whether it is centerpieces, programs, favors, whatever)?
Post # 15
I agree with the prior posters that, at this supremely late date, the only reason to cancel your wedding plans is if you and/or your Fiance have decided that you do not want to get married.
If you are still going to be married, and you’ve already sent invitations; booked vendors; and paid hefty, non-refundable deposits; it doesn’t make sense to cancel your plans and to lose all of that money.
Also, from an etiquette perspective, unless you would invite everyone that you have already invited to the wedding and reception to your “informal party,” you would, in essence, be uninviting all of those other guests.