(Closed) canceling what's left of my "bachelorette party"

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
Member
9589 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

Wow your Maid/Matron of Honor is a bitchy narcicisstic control freak. I would tell your 3 BMs to take over and tell them what days work for you, and assure them something simple is great.  If your Maid/Matron of Honor is lucky maybe they will tell her the details! 

Post # 3
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2017 - 1800s era Church

I would definitely talk to your Maid/Matron of Honor about it. If she doesn’t want to plan it, that’s fine. But making things harder on you and stressing you out is not worth it.

You could ask your other bridesmaids that since your Maid/Matron of Honor isn’t giving them information, if they can all communicate with each other then. if they would like to, they can plan something that works for everyone and you can just inform your Maid/Matron of Honor that’s what’s happening.

I’m sorry you’re having to go through that. 

Post # 4
Member
2870 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

Agreed with the Previous post!

Post # 8
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

daniellemc:  that sounds really nice and a sweet way to kick off a wedding weekend.

If you thinking about going to a vineyard or a spa day, that shouldn’t be too difficult to plan on short notice for an upcoming weekend? I guess brides aren’t suppose to plan their own, but you could just ask a bridesmaid or your mom to pick a place and send out a group email, pick a day that works for most people and book it. Done and done!

Post # 9
Member
6717 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Skip the Maid/Matron of Honor entirely.  Get your other girls to pick the date.  When the Maid/Matron of Honor finally gets back to you, tell her you’re sorry but the schedule is already set and you hope she can join you.  This makes no sense at all!  And for what it’s worth, there’s no rule that a Maid/Matron of Honor has to do all the planning – for anything weddign related for the one I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man in, we all did the legwork together for her shower (no bachelorette at all).  We’re all good friends or siblings, why not participate?  I’m sure your bridesmaids can handle getting a date together and sending her that information.

Post # 10
Member
894 posts
Busy bee

Wow…you have to ditch her for now and plan your own bach party. Tell her shes welcome to to join, but no ones joining the one she planned. 

Post # 11
Member
154 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

WOW! I would probably drop this crazy person as my Maid/Matron of Honor. What is wrong with her?! I hope you’re able to plan something fun with your girls!

Post # 12
Member
1652 posts
Bumble bee

Your Maid/Matron of Honor needs to get “the boot” right up her azz.   Call her now and say “bye Felicia. One and done, just like the baby wipes. 

Post # 13
Member
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

I would drop her as Maid/Matron of Honor and I would toss her out of the bridal party completely. What she is doing is just awful. 

Troublemakers shouldn’t be in charge of important events, because this is the kind of stuff they do. She may have been a good friend before, and may still be one in many ways, but I don’t think this is something I would tolerate. She’s not just messing up your plans, she’s messing up the plans of the people who are trying to be there for you. That’s inexcusable.

Post # 14
Member
2528 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

If she responds to you the call her up on it. She sounds like an absolute control freak. Making people phone her?! Personally I prefer to do non-emergency contacts via text/email because then you can answer in your own time. 

I know it isn’t au fait but I would – not necessarily organise it yourself but speak to your other bridesmaids and hopefully find a date that suits you guys. Then maybe reach out to other guests and see if they are free. Maybe one of your BMs can organise something simple for you. It doesn’t have to be much – dinner or something.

Oh, and if it happens to be the same night as the thing your Maid/Matron of Honor has planned…then I’d go to the other thing and say to Maid/Matron of Honor she can come if she likes.

Post # 15
Member
263 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

She would no longer be my Maid/Matron of Honor

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