(Closed) Candle Lighting at Catholic Mass

posted 5 years ago in Catholic
Post # 3
Member
2968 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

i’m assuming you’re talking about the unity candle. usually the priest will say something to effect of the candles representing two becoming one. and of course, music will be playing too. if you have a special poem in mind, maybe they’ll allow that to be read also.

Post # 4
Member
7992 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

Do they definitely allow a unity candle or a sand ceremony? Check that first. Some places don’t.

Post # 5
Member
476 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

Yes– make sure it’s OK to have one or both. My church would have allowed it, but some are very strict because it’s not actually part of the Mass. If they allow it, then you can find out how the priest usually incorporates it.

Post # 6
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2013

My church won’t let you do a unity candle as part of the wedding ceremony.  You can have one but it will get lit before the processional without any mention of it.  I’m just not going to have one…one more thing I don’t have to buy.

Post # 7
Member
3766 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

My church also strongly discourages unity candles or sand ceremonies

Post # 8
Member
927 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Our church would’t allow it. What we did instead was light the unity candle while grace was said at the reception dinner.

Post # 9
Member
2 posts
Wannabee

The Unity Candle is a fairly recent usage, widely used in Catholic weddings even though not formalised in the Roman Missal. Being lit by both spouses, it better represents current social reality of shared responsibilities, where both will be working for a salary as well as both helping keep the home. It has replaced the older usage (just after the exchange of rings) where the husband used to give a symbolic gift to the new wife (“This gold and silver I give you, tokens of all that I own.”)

At our pre-marriage course we strongly recommend the use of The Unity Candle at the wedding, with a view to its being later kept in the home as a symbol of the declared intention of sharing the workload fairly!

Fr. Pat Rogers

http://www.together.ie/panel.html

Post # 10
Member
2254 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Definitely make sure if your church allows it before you decide on a plan. My church didn’t allow a unity candle or a sand ceremony in any part of the wedding ceremony or mass. 

Post # 11
Member
1719 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

During pre-cana class, the priest said that the unity candle isn’t part of the rite but more for the couple/family so if we wanted it, we need to ask for it.  We didn’t bother with one.  I’d ask the church/priest about it and maybe he can help you with it.

 

Post # 12
Member
1719 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

During pre-cana class, the priest said that the unity candle isn’t part of the rite but more for the couple/family so if we wanted it, we need to ask for it.  We didn’t bother with one.  I’d ask the church/priest about it and maybe he can help you with it.

Post # 13
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

It was pretty simple at our wedding.  The priest made a small announcement that it was about to be done, then we walked over and lit the candle while music played.  Took probably about 45 seconds.  But like PPs said, check with your church.  My cousin got married right before me in a nearby church and the unity candle was not allowed during her mass.

Post # 14
Member
1477 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Maybe someone other than the priest at your church can answer your questions. Catholic churches can be very picky and some things vary from church to church.

Post # 15
Member
12248 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

Check that your priest allows either one!

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