(Closed) Cannot get a hold of Priest!!! 1 month to go!

posted 8 years ago in Catholic
Post # 3
Member
4123 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Call your diocese marriage office…. 

Post # 4
Member
1580 posts
Bumble bee

I’ve never heard of that happening before. I’d try to find another priest on my own. Is there only one priest at your church?

Post # 5
Member
315 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

This is a STRANGE situation!  We didn’t hear back from our priest for a while, and later found out he was on medical leave, so it was a good thing that I kept following up.  Your wedding is so close.  I think it is time to call the diocese and explain your situation.  Or, reach out to the parish priest one more time and ask for direction, and if he is not help, then contact the diocese.  Interested to hear what happens!!

Post # 6
Member
2867 posts
Sugar bee

I would contact the priest who’s been helping you, and ask if he can assist you in contacting or finding another priest.  I also second KLP’s suggestion.

Post # 9
Member
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Can you just show up at the church for a weekday mass and hang around after to try to corner the priest?  Tell him you have been trying over and over to get in contact with him for weeks now, but have been pushed aside.  Tell him you NEED to set up a meeting and don’t leave until you get one.  This is ridiculous, there is no reason why a priest of all people should be so unavailable. 

Post # 11
Member
573 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

It’s definitely upsetting to schedule your wedding with your home parish and the priest you have a relationship with and then find out he will be out of town. We had something similar happen, but were able to meet with the priest who would be marrying us once before the rehersal and ceremony (we rearranged our schedules for it, but it was really important to us).

I’m so sad to hear that you are feeling disillusioned with the Church because of this. There is a shortage of clergy memebers and most parishes are overextended trying to keep up with their community activities, several Mass times each week, confessions, funerals, counseling, education programs, charity programs, etc.. Are you close with any deacons in or outside of  your parish? Have you had a relationship with any other priests, maybe from your FH’s parish? I hope things work out for you. Maybe you can focus on the music with the music director and the readings by your family and friends. Taking time to memorize your vows and the exchange of rings can really make your ceremony more personal.

Things will work out and you will have a beautiful day with your family and friends!

Post # 12
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’m so sorry your priest and your diocese have put you in this situation!

My date is two years off, and I’m just starting to do research into different aspects of Catholic marriage (my situation is so complicated I won’t even go into it now), but I did just read about something that may help you: convalidation.

The idea is that a couple who gets married outside of the faith and then wishes to have their marriage validated by the Roman Catholic Church can do so after their initial wedding date.

So, in a worst case scenario, you could contact a justice of the peace. Then, whenever you can get ahold of your priest, he can validate the marriage (with permission from the bishop, I believe). This will entail some paperwork and additional jumping through hoops, but you can do this at your leisure after your wedding date. And given the situation, I think the diocese would allow this. It’s certainly not your fault that this has happened.

Post # 14
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Maybe contact your reception venue and see if they would allow the ceremony to take place there? If you could explain the emergency circumstances, they might waive any additional ceremony fees.

Good luck! I’ll be thinking of you! 🙂

Edit: Also, it can’t hurt to contact your local library to ask for help in contacting a judge or finding another ceremony location at short notice (if your reception venue doesn’t allow ceremonies). Reference librarians live for challenges like this. Disclosure: I am a librarian, but am in technical services for now. Used to be in the public services division. I miss helping people, lol!

Post # 16
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Yea I haven’t had the best experiences with parish secretaries either.  My mom is even friends with one, but its like when she gets into her business mode she decides “Now is the time to be rude to everyone.”

Parish life isn’t perfect.  I had to let go of a lot of disallusionments I had from volunteering in youth ministry and CCD as well as getting married.  I think a lot it is though is the effects of the priest shortage and the over-abundance of paperwork the diocese requires to do even the simpliest of tasks.  

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