(Closed) Cannot stand one of his freinds… (might be long)

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

Maybe we do need more.   WHY do you not like the friend. If he is a bad influence that is one thing, if he is just annoying that is another.

Post # 4
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Yeah, we definitely need the reason why you don’t like the friend to be able to give you our opinions

Post # 5
Member
2216 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@lefeymw:I agree.  We need more information. 

 

OP – There are definitely friends of my FI’s that I don’t like, who are bad influences (ie: into drugs) and who constantly hit up my Fiance for money.  I just try and stay away.  Fiance is a grown man and can make his own decisions on who he hangs out with.  But at the same time, I can make my own decisions and stay away from these so-called friends. 

Post # 7
Member
5787 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

I need more info but I think my answer is prob still going to be you can’t ask you Boyfriend or Best Friend to break up with his friends. I don’t want to hang out with all of DH’s friends which is why they hang out without me. How would you feel if he told you you had to dump a friend because he didn’t like her? I bet you wouldn’t be happy.

Post # 8
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

have you tried telling him all these things? Maybe in order to hang out with this friend, he has to get certain things done around the house first.

Post # 9
Member
3482 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I would first call attention to how your Boyfriend or Best Friend behaves toward you when he’s with that particular friend and ask him why he acts that way, when around his other friends he’s his usual self. You can blame the friend all you want, but if your Boyfriend or Best Friend is part of the reason you’re angry then you need to deal with that part of the issue first.

Post # 10
Member
6823 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Definately talk to your BF and how he acts towards you when he is around his friend.  He may not realize he does this.

But as to telling your Boyfriend or Best Friend he can’t be friends with that guy is little controlling and you really don’t have a say on who your Boyfriend or Best Friend friends are. 

 

Post # 11
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

Tritto. What does your bf say when you tell him you feel this way and observe this behavior.

The behavior is not acceptable, but you can not tell him how to spend his money. 

Post # 13
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Doesn’t matter if he sees it or not. I would call him out right in front of the friend when he does it, and ask the friend point blank why he doesn’t acknowledge you

Post # 14
Member
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

That sounds like one of my guy’s bff.  Expect my guy is starting to see that his friendship with him is one sided.  So after the wedding, he’s going to maintain a friendship, but not go out of his way for this friend.  I’m so glad for that, because I can only stand so many phone calls (sometimes in the middle of the night) asking my guy to drop everything just to drive 1 hour to his house to hang out or drive to pick up his daughter from his house and dropping her off after we spent the day babysitting her for him! We caught him going through our medicine cabinet so he is cutting the cord. 🙂

Post # 15
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

@MrsSl82be: This.  If the friend says nothing, next time start the conversation. Don’t wait for him. Maybe he is waiting for you. Conversations go both ways. Also, ask open ended questions. Not one word answer questions

If you have tried this and it didnt work call him out. Say “Joe, I live here too, how about talking to me?”

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