Post # 1
- Wedding: October 2019 - Charlotte, NC
Hi lovely bees!
I’d love to get your thoughts on shoes. For context, I’m very petite (5 ft. exactly) and my FH is tall (5ft. 11). I’m planning to wear shoes that will give me at least 3.5 inches in height because I think our pictures will look better (FH’s entire family is also the same height if not taller and everyone in our wedding party will be at least 4 inches taller than me) and it will be less awkward when we do our first dance (I know it’s probably not true but I think I look like a rag doll getting dragged around when we dance because of the significant difference in our sizes lol).
I already own a pair of wedges that would work height-wise. I know they’re comfortable because I’ve worn them on multiple occassions including my commute to work with no major problems or a need to break them in. They’re the Marc Fisher Adalyn wedges (photo below). They’re not at all traditional bridal shoes, but they wouldn’t show up under my dress because the hem goes all the way to the floor and it’s several layers of tulle which means that even the dark color of the shoes don’t come through. We’re also having an outdoor ceremony with a rustic elegance theme, and so a major plus is not having to worry about the heels sinking into grass during the ceremony and when we walk around the pastures and forest for our photos afterwards.
Unfortunately, I came across several incredible pairs of Badgley Mischka shoes in my bridal magazines this weekend and got hooked with how pretty they are. I did some Googling and it seems split on whether or not brides found them to be comfortable. For the bees who have worn these shoes in 3.5 in or taller heel heights or other similar brands/styles, was the potential lack of comfort worth it in the end?
If it’s helpful, I’ve included a stock photo of my dress below (the Enzoani Ibarki) – part of the reason I’m stuck on shoes is because I know the BMs/similar styles would look dreamy with my dress in a way that the wedges wouldn’t. I also worry that the wedges are way too casual/would clash with the dress if I prop my feet up during photos or they are exposed somehow. I also wouldn’t have the nice photo op of showcasing the shoes that a lot of brides do.
What do you think? Should I be sensible and stick with the wedges or just go for the nicer shoes and hope for the best?
Thanks for any advice or ideas!
Post # 2
I’m 4’11” and FH is 6’5” so I hear you on this as well as the bridal party being tall. Those wedges are way too casual to wear with such an elegant dress. You’re short, he’s tall, embrace it. DO NOT wear uncomfortable shoes for your wedding, but on the same page those wedges are also are hard no. I will be wearing a pair of Steve Madden heels that will add 2 inches to my height. I’ve come to terms with the fact that our pictures may be a little mismatched height wise, but that’s us 🤷🏻♀️
Photo for reference wearing the same shoe I will wear on my wedding day (I will buy a new pair of course)
Post # 3
I’m always going to vote comfortable, but I wore converse to my wedding so your version of comfortable is wild to me lol. I don’t think it’s so crazy to wear your comfy wedges. White matches with everything in my opinion and I think your feet will be really happy in a pair that you already know you can survive in. If you’re absolutely set on that kind of heel height and want something more bridal looking then maybe shop around for shoes with better reviews.
Post # 4
drewby1121 : I love those wedges but I wouldn’t wear them under my dress, mainly because I would worry they would show up in pics and totally clash, like you mentioned.
Have you considered like an ankle strap block heel? That’s what I wore and we were standing for a LONG time, literally hours and walking around for pics on uneven roads and my feet didn’t hurt until like hour 4. I imagine most brides aren’t on their feet that long, non stop.
Post # 5
I am all for comfort but would not wear those wedges under a wedding gown. As PP said, they are too casual plus the buckle may snag the fabric.
Can you look at purchasing another pair or wedges that will suit the dress?
Post # 6
Are the wedges available in white or ivory?
Post # 7
Also would not wear those particular wedges on your wedding day. I wore 4” caged heels (I’m 5’4” and wanted to look nice and tall in my dress, my husband is 6’) and they were incredibly comfortable! You definitely still need to break in any pair of heels in your house before the big day, but a caged heel keeps your foot from slipping (which is often what causes discomfort!) AND often looks fancier than a wedged heel.
Post # 8
I’m all about comfort and practicality. I’d hate to be in pain on my wedding day or have heels sink into the lawn. You could find some pretty white wedges that will go with your dress that you will also get wear out of over the summer. I found some bridal wedges below.
If you want to do shoe photos and have the budget, then buy the B.M. ones ( I’d choose a versatile style) as well and swap them out for the pics and put the white wedges back on for the dancing and mingling.
Post # 9
Go for comfort. Otherwise you’ll just end up taking the shoes off anyway. I’m 5’1 and my husband is 5’11 and no problems with me in flat shoes.
Post # 10
I went for comfort. I’m 5’3” and FH is 6” – but more than that, I always imagined having a high heel would elongate me and make me look slimmer. But I just can’t imagine being in pain when walking towards him or taking photos, etc. I ended up trying a beautiful pair of shoes on that were 3.5” or 4” and I just knew I’d manage for 20 minutes and regret it – so I ended up going with a kitten heel from that same brand that are sparkly and beautiful and comfortable!
Post # 11
chitownyogini : How cute are you two!
I agree with PPs that the espadrilles are way too casual for the wedding dress and to try a more formal wedge that will avoid the sinking problem outdoors.
Post # 12
I vote comfort but I wouldn’t wear those wedges. I didn’t think you’d see my shoes at all, but our photographer had us do a lot of “fun” photos where we’d run through a field together, he’d lift me up, etc. My shoes peek through in all of those shots, so I’d wear a pair of shoes with the assumption they might be seen. Could you find a fancier pair of wedges, so you can still be comfortable but have the ‘wow’ factor?
Post # 13
- Wedding: November 2020 - North Carolina
There are nicer wedges available. I see someone has already posted a few pics.
Post # 14
You are giving mixed messages. You said the wedges wouldn’t be seen because the hem goes all the way to the floor. Then you said the Badgley Mischka’s would look deamy with your dress. If the wedges won’t be seen, neither will the Badgley Mischka’s. The only time your shoes will be seen is for the bridal shoe shot, but if you don’t want that, what does it matter what are on your feet?
If you want the stereotypical shoe shot, get a pair of dreamy shoes from Nordstrom Rack, and change for the reception.
It would be a lot easier to rely on your photographer to know how to pose the two of you, even if that means bringing a little riser, rather than wear uncomfortable tall shoes.
I have tried Badgely Mschka’s and find them distinctly uncomfortable.
If the March Fisher wedges are comfortable, does he make a dressier style?
For $29 I would paint the cork wedge gold to go with the straps.
Post # 15