(Closed) Can't handle it all!

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
5093 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2012

@unhappywithFI:  Your relationship sounds to me like it’s extremely unstable.  Why do you want to marry this man?

Post # 4
Member
3121 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Engagements and marriage are not something to be held over someone’s head.  You may feel ready to get married, but he’s clearly not.  He’s also not treating you with respect AT ALL.  I know this is only a glimpse at your relationship, but I think you deserve much better.

Post # 5
Member
1310 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

When his mom says he is “too young” how young is he? he sounds VERY young emotionally.

When you are with the “one,” they will want to marry you all the time, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. There will be no wishywashing about it.

Post # 6
Member
914 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

He’s playing games with you. Someone who truly wants to marry you and be with you doesn’t use marriage as a way to manipulate you. It’s obvious that it is not important to him and he’s just using it as a way to keep you around when things get icky.

You need to decide if this is what you want your relationship to be like. Or do you want someone who without a question/doubt wants to spend his life with you no matter what it takes.

I’m really sorry you’re being jerked around like this 🙁

Post # 7
Member
519 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

We waited for marriage and we dated for almost 8 years, lol. So if waiting is important to you, it can be done. I hope the only reason you want to marry him isn’t so you guys don’t have to wait anymore.

I think you both need to think about the reasons that you want to marry each other. He needs to do it because he’s so back and forth all the time. If one minute he wants to marry you, then the next he doesn’t – does he truly want to be with you? And you need to ask yourself why you want to spend the rest of your life with someone who treats you so poorly. Marriage is a big deal. I wish you the best. 

Post # 8
Member
66 posts
Worker bee

All the arrows are seem to be pointing at the same thing: This is a bad relationship, or at the very least ( since we don’t know your whole story) you guys are in a very bad place.

If you want to work it out, then do it with the help of time, space, and counseling for you both. If your tired of it all, then I recommend you end things, and don’t give in. Get support from family & friends and find what you feel you deserve in a relationship!

 

Post # 9
Member
2457 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I have to agree with PP. Why are you still with him? I don’t mean that to sound harsh – what I mean is, what is it about him that keeps you wanting to be with him? And, would you really want to marry a man who engages in constant emotional manipulation? Personally, just from what you’ve told us, I think that you guys waiting is definitely a good thing. It will allow you to see if you truly want to marry *this* man, or if you just want to be married. 

Post # 10
Member
597 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@unhappywithFI:  I’m soo sorry to tell you this, but it sounds like you need to walk away. He’s not serious, he’s playing games and I’m soo sorry you’re on for the ride. 

This doesn’t sound healthy or good. I hope everything works out for you, we can tell you up and down what we think, but only you know what is right for you. 

I really hope you put an update up once this is resolved. 

*hugs and love* 

Post # 11
Member
5405 posts
Bee Keeper

It sounds like he has emotional issues, or is just very immature. 

Post # 12
Member
98 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Relationships are not supposed to be this hard… And I’m confused why you want to marry a man that doesn’t respect you and acts like he doesn’t even like you? Please do yourself a favor and leave him for good, don’t waste one more day with this guy. He should be honoring you and dying to marry you!

Post # 13
Member
2589 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Why do you want to marry someone when youre fully aware he’s playing mind games with you?

Relationships are hard work, but they shouldn’t be miserable.

Post # 14
Member
1141 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

It sounds like he’s just not ready or mature enough to get married. When people say things over and over, you really should believe that it’s what they mean, even if they keep taking it back. I’m sorry I know this stuff is tough but think about how tough it could be if you marry and then he’s threatening divorce every time he wants his way or gets angry. Sometimes a boyfriend should’nt move past being a boyfriend and not every relationship leads to marriage.

Post # 15
Member
2494 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

He sounds very, VERY manipulative. Take this as a warning and a good way to avoid an expensive divorce later down the road.

Calling names, ignoring you, not being hospitable, using marriage as leverage is ALL very manipulative behaviour. I would consider talking to a councillor, if nothing else.

Post # 16
Member
386 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Early waring signs, I wouldn’t marry him. He doesn’t respect you. You are now on an emotional roller coaster. You don’t need this. You need to get away from him and give youself sometime to think.

He is playing a mind game with you.

The topic ‘Can't handle it all!’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors