@CinderellaSoon: First of all, Congratulations on your weight loss! You have already lost a lot of weight and should be super proud of yourself. We all fall off the wagon sometimes, but you SHOULD NOT feel ashamed.
1). Please remember how wonderful you are. Your Fiance is marrying you because he loves you, fat, thin, naked, clothed, with hair and (after the wedding) will be contractually obligated to love you bald! Total honesty here, I struggle with my weight as well, but you need to refuse to let something like weight get in the way of you ENJOYING your life (or honeymoon!). I actually really like Jillian Michaels – not the biggest loser JM – but the normal one who is in her regular workout dvds, books, and podcast. One of the things I’ve heard her talk about is re-programming your brain to the way you think about yourself. I’m not a scientist so I’m obiously generalizing here, but when we are constantly negative about ourselves, our brain actually reinforces those neuron pathways. When we start forcing ourselves to think positively, it creates NEW pathways, and eventually thinking more affirmatively actually gets easier.
Try it. When you want to think something negative about yourself (/ catch yourself doing it), stop. Instead say/think something that is similar but actually positive. I.e., instead of “I’m a loser for falling off the bandwagon” you could say “I am strong and capable and have already lost a huge amoung of weight.”
2) Please don’t take diet pills. They are dangerous, and not good for your metabolism. If you’re going to take anything, I reccomend taking “Ally.” It’s expensive, but it’s the only FDA approved pill for a reason. Basically, it forces you to change your eating habits because once you take it, you can only eat something with so much fat in it. Honestly, I’m not sure if I think that’s a great idea because there are such a thing as “good fats” (nuts, avacados, etc in moderation.) But if you’ve been binging on nachos, etc. It might be what you need.
3). Committ to yourself and your goal. You need to make an emotional connection to your goal. What is it that you want? Why? Do you want to be able to hike a mountain 6 months from now with DH? or even just look great in a bathing suit? Ok, well what will it feel like when you put on that bathing suit? What will the sun feel like on your body? What does it mean to you? Use this connection to get you through the tough times and stay committed to that goal. Girl, you’re getting married, you know how to committ! ; )
4). You actually just have to stop allowing yourself to obsess about food. This is tricky, but again, this is where the emotional connection comes in. For a while, it really is just a question of “Do I want these nachos right now or do I want the other, X goal?” or “Is this decision going to get me closer or farther away from my goal?”
5). Also, set yourself up for success, not failure. If you’re having a hard time avoiding Burger King at lunch.. Well, pack your lunch and take a different route to work. Don’t even drive by!
6). It’s actually not the healthiest, but it’s a big step up from soda. Have you ever tried club soda with a little bit of Crystal Light in it? They make all sorts of flavors of crystal Light (my favorite is Lemonade personally), and if you add it to club soda (I also suggest adding a few organic frozen berries for fun antioxidents and to make it pretty) it’s REALLY good. Zero calories and still has the bubbles so it feels like a treat. From there you could always add less and less crystal light to wean yourself to just drinking club soda. (This is what Darling Husband and I did. At first he thought I was crazy, but now loves club soda too!) And it’s a LOT cheaper than pop!
Look, in the end, it doesn’t really matter how much you weight. I’m sure that Darling Husband wants you to be the happiest, healthiest version of you so that you guys can enjoy your life together to the fullest extent possible. If you want to lose the weight, you can, you have already proven that. However, it’s also going to take a lot of soul searching to figure out why you’re sabotaging yourself, and what about losing the weight you might be afraid of. (For me, for example, I figured out that on some level I was afraid that my family and friends might actually judge me for being thinner and healthy because they aren’t).
Good luck and lots of love!