(Closed) Can't stop thinking of a previous partner..

posted 4 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
1265 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

strawberriesandmint:  These are some difficult feelings you are having, and I’m sorry you’re going through this right now. It sounds like you are very rational about the situation and understand why you feel the way you feel. 

The only advice I wanted to share is to be kind to yourself and let yourself feel a bit uncomfortable about this for a while. I know that sounds really strange, but it honestly works. It’s not pleasant, but it won’t break you and that way you will be able to feel the way you feel and get it out of your system. It’s likely that seeing Brian has stirred up these thoughts and that there isn’t really any bigger issue other than the fact that you (understandably) don’t like the way you feel. 

When we tell ourselves off for feeling a certain way or try hard not to think about something, it really only gives it more power. If you can cut yourself some slack, recognise you’re not hurting anyone but yourself, and allow yourself to find some peace with these thoughts, I am sure they will pass. 

Wishing you the best of luck and am very happy that you have found yourself a wonderful marriage that I’m sure will last you a lifetime. 

Post # 3
3638 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Miss_Mae:  Such amazing advice!

OP, listen to her, she knowns her stuff.

Just to make sure the message sinks in: it’s ok to have these thoughts sometimes. Many people go through phases such as this when the finality of marriage randomly hits you for a few weeks. But these things fade in time. 

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