(Closed) Cash Bar?

posted 10 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
2066 posts
Buzzing bee

My opinion is its tacky (you asked).  If you were hosting a party at your home, you wouldn’t ask guests to pay for drinks.  The same rules apply for a wedding.  If you can’t afford to serve the mixed drinks, then don’t have them as an option.  

Post # 4
Member
2342 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Its totally okay!!  It’s not in everyones budget to do an open bar!  It’s your wedding, so only do what you can afford!  Besides, beer and wine is good enough!!

Post # 5
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think that’s ok because you’re supplying some alcohol.  We are having beer, wine, soda, and a signature cocktail.  The reception is at a restaurant that has a full bar, so if someone wants something else they can get it, but they will have to pay for it since we are not having an open bar.

Post # 6
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

i think cash bars are not nice (and i dont drink alcohol) but i hear in some areas its quite the norm

i would prefer to stick to beer, wine & soda if it was me as that seems to be the norm for weddings we attend and ive never head any complaints

 

Post # 7
Member
1756 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I also find the idea of a cash bar to be a little offensive, and my logic is similar to texasmeredith’s. If I invited a guest to my home, I would not charge them for liquor. If I invited a guest to an event where they would potentially be flying to attend said event, paying for a hotel, paying for a rental car, and purchasing a gift for me, I most certainly would not charge them for liquor. Perhaps it’s because I know our friends like to get their drink on, but an open bar was a non-negotiable expense for my fiance and me when we started planning our wedding. If I were totally unable to afford an open bar, I would consider either a beer/wine reception, or a brunch event with champagne and desserts.

Post # 8
Member
367 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Hiya this is going to go against all the other comments but I am not having an open bar for my wedding. And I also do not totally agree that if I was having a party I would supply all the liquor. My friends certainly like to get their drink on as redherring said but that does not mean that we can afford it! It is great that you are thinking of having beer, wine, and soda available. It really is just about what you can realistically afford. If having an open bar is high on your priority list, go for it. If not, use the money you’d save and put it towards something more important. We cannot afford an open bar. Besides I’ll only have been 21 for a month when we get married. Our guests know I’m a student and that we have a mortgage plus other bills to pay. Good luck! And I sincerely hope that I did not offend anyone!

Post # 9
Member
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I also don’t think it’s offensive to have beer/wine/soda and one drink ticket for mixed drinks and have a cash bar for further mixed drinks. My friends also like to drink and I know that it can be very, very expensive to have an open bar for people who like to drink a lot. If you can’t afford it, then I don’t think it’s a bad thing to only offer certain drinks free and have your guests pay for other drinks.

Post # 10
Member
5493 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2011

I think a cash bar is a no no.  A hostess should not offer something she can’t afford and ask her guests to cover the cost.  Imagine if you went to a wedding where the appetizers and dessert were supplied but if you wanted dinner you had to pay.  Or other way around.  If you can’t afford it, don’t offer it.  The beer and wine should be enough. 

Some people might say that even when you go to someone’s home for a party you usually bring a bottle of something to help offset the cost so you are paying for your drinks.  well when it comes to the wedding people are bringing you gifts and those gifts are (most likely) way more expensive than the money that would be put towards paying for a few of their drinks.

Post # 11
Member
282 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Tacky! People are spending money on you and your gifts… you pay for the party…   I would suggest just sticking to beer and wine and don’t open it up for other drinks. That way you are supplying what you can afford and they feel like they are receiving the gift of boose in return…. good luck

Post # 12
Member
24 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2010

While I agree with many of of the other commenters regarding the etiquette side of being a proper host(ess) for your guests, I have attended a wedding that included a open-bar cocktail hour, champagne toast, and wine with dinner with a cash bar after dinner/cake cutting/etc.

Really, it was just the party-hardy crew who purchased additional drinks (I may or may not have been part of that crew 😉 ) and I never once felt that this was inappropriate or tacky as a guest and I don’t think anyone else did either…just an anecdotal experience, fwiw. 

Part of me thinks just offer the beer and wine and a signature drink during cocktail hour, but if you feel the group might be put off at the lack of a full bar and won’t take issue with paying for their drinks, then go for it. You know your attendees! 🙂

 

Post # 13
Member
342 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Go for the cash bar! It is not tacky, you are providing food, atmosphere, a limited supply of drinks for everyone; that is more than enough.  A cash bar limits the amount people will drink and limits the amount of half drank glasses.  I have been to a wedding that was open bar and it was so wasteful, people would only drink half their drink before getting a new one.  As for the hostess comments, at least where I come from, you buy what you normally drink and people bring whatever they normally drink. 

Post # 14
Member
3979 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

I went to a wedding last week where they had a cash bar. I paid $650 for my flight there, I was in the wedding party, I paid for a dress and new shoes. Seriously… they couldn’t buy me a martini?

So… during dinner they served wine & punch. During the dancing portion of the reception all of a sudden it went to a cash bar. I was charged even for water & I’m pretty sure it was just tap. All the drinks were in plastic cups to boot! A pop or juice? $3.25. A real drink (also in a plastic cup) over $7.

I was appalled & had I not been in the bridal party I would have left.  

I think you’re better off just serving beer, wine & non-alcoholic beverages and forgetting the cash bar! 

Post # 15
Member
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I don’t think having a cash bar is tacky.  Yes, your friends and family will be spending money traveling from miles and miles away to see you and your sweetheart wed but they will also understand that throwing a wedding is not cheap.  I think your idea sounds great Laughing

Post # 16
Member
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

I think cash bars are tacky, yes.  However, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with just offering beer, wine and soda.

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