Post # 16
Host what you can afford. Guests should not have to reach into their wallet.
Post # 17
Consumption bar. This sounds like a fairly low-key affair on a weeknight. You likely aren’t going to pay more than a few hundred for drinks. Just give the bartender your credit card and tell them to put the drinks on your tab. This way everyone gets to drink what they like and you’ll likely spend the same or more likely less than the wine pairings.
Post # 18
For my US wedding, we are having a cash bar. It’s very common where I live. For our wedding in my SO’s country, it’s hosted because that’s just how they always do it. But since you wanted to host, just do it per consumption since not all will be drinking. penny1403 :
Post # 19
Like PPs have said, have the restaurant charge you for the wine based on consumption.
Post # 20
What is the standard in your circle of friends?
Post # 21
Assuming OP is in the US, there isn’t any such regional standard. More likely those who make this claim have a group of uninformed friends or family members. But just because others may behave inappropriately doesn’t mean she should.
Post # 22
I’m not a lawyer, but I’d think that it’s not legal to offer a wine pairing for someone who is under the drinking age (21 years old in the US), so the restaurant shouldn’t be charging you for something they are not legally allowed to serve, like a wine pairing for kids–that’s ridiculous!
Post # 23
I agree with PP’s. Have the venue charge it on consumption.
Post # 24
lol I don’t think I have been to a wedding in 7 or 8 years. I have no idea what is norm at this point. My first wedding was 17 years ago and we had beer and wine.
Post # 25
I am in the US. We meet with them on Wednesday to go over options but I think I will just lean towards just paying for drinks that are consumed.
Post # 26
I wouldn’t pay for the wine pairings because it would probably be wasted.
can you not just order a certain no of bottles of wine – calculate how much you think you drinking guests would drink and have the waiters serve those bottles on the night?
just because the restaurant specialises in wine doesn’t mean your guests will.
pre-order what you think your guests will drink and pay for that.
Post # 27
I dont love a cash bar but do think its easier to have one at a traditional wedding reception where you have to go up to the bar to get a drink or the waitress comes to your table and you pay immediately. How would the resteraunt even work people buying there own? Would they do seperate checks? It seems a little confusing in this situation.
Post # 28
that’s a great suggestion and I will ask about that on Wednesday night