MemberHi ladies! We’re having a very low-key, very casual rehearsal dinner…for my Latina brides out there, we’re doing a caja china 😉 We’ll be at a local hole-in-the-wall restaurant, and our guest list of 60-70 people should fill the place. Do you think a cash bar would be appropriate for an event like this? Or is it tacky?
MemberHow would it be tacky? It’s the rehearsal dinner. You’re buying them dinner, if they want to drink that’s their own affair!
MemberIf guests are paying for their own dinner, then it is ok for them to buy their own drinks. If you (or anyone else) are paying for their dinner, the least you can do is buy their drinks too. It’s considered rude to host a party of any kind where you offer food but charge them for anything else where they have to open their own wallets. If you cannot afford to pay for their drinks, offer what you can afford and don’t offer anything else.
MemberWhy not go with a dry rehearsal dinner? or Pay for white wine for your guests? If you’re having alcohol at your wedding, I don’t see why you have to have it at both…
MemberDo you mind me asking, if you’re having 60-70 for the rehearsal dinner, how many are you having for the wedding? Must be a big do!
And going on what Ember said, maybe it would be apt to just pay for the wine with the food then, not a full bar or anything.
MemberI had acash bar for my rehearsal dinner. 
To be honest, I didn’t know what was what. And I think the catering manager suggested it. Or if I asked what to do, basically said it was fine. But my Dh was not happy when he showed up to the Rehearsal Dinner… (He was Out of Town. so I had to book the Rehearsal Dinner by myself.)
It all worked out. But if I could go back, I would have paid for the drinks.
Memberi second ember’s comment – its rude to have folks open their wallets on a hosted dinner. if they are paying their own meals then fine. but otherwise, i would offer standard stuff like beer or wine and leave it at that, or have a dry rehearsal dinner.
MemberI am not providing alcohol at my rehearsal dinner. I am having a completely open bar at my wedding, and I would actually rather not have my bridal party drink a ton the night before. I don’t see rehearsal dinner as a party, ours is only about 20 people, so pretty intimate. So they can go ahead and eat awesome steak and drink all the pepsi they want, but if they want a long island…it’s on them. Maybe I am a jerk though, I don’t know.
Member@ aunt pol, Haha it does make it sound like a big do! We’re actually having about 140 people at our wedding, but most of them are from out of town. Rehearsal dinner is gonna be about half of the guest list! We decided we’d rather have more people and less fancy food than the other way around 🙂
I like the idea of only paying for a little bit…maybe since we’re doing caja china, we could do one mojito for everyone to be served with dinner?
MemberWhat do the majority of your guests drink? Many people actually don’t like wine so that would be a waste of money unless you know for a fact that your guests drink it. Many people would be happy with just sodas with just sodas if that is all you can afford.
What type of menu are you having for your rehearsal dinner? For example, if you were having Mexican food, then most folks would rather have margaritas than wine. If you were having pizza, then beer is a popular option, but again many don’t like beer either.
While it may not be “popular”, it is ok too to have no alcohol at all.
MemberI think the mojito sounds like a good idea. And maybe just soft drinks with dinner then! But that’s just me – I’d rather just have soda/water with food, then the drink after. Prob not a bad idea to just spring for the one cocktail, I’d say you’d like clear heads in the morning lol !!
Member@ Miss Britt, That’s a good point too. Our wedding is at 11:00 AM the next morning, and I’d hate to have hungover guests! My dilemma with having a dry wedding is that there is a bar in the restaurant, and I feel like one or two guests would take it upon themselves to buy themselves a drink anyway…so I feel like our options are sucking it up and paying some money but being good hosts, or having an unintentional cash bar haha
MemberWell there’s your solution then. Just the mojito. Sounds like a fun night!
MemberI would pay for a signature drink and if they want something else they can pay.
Member@julieelizabeth3, that is kind of why I decided not to provide any alcohol at rehearsal. There is a bar at the our rehearsal dinner venue as well, but they would physically have to get up and go to it. I am not going to tell people, no you cannot drink. But I want as clear and alert group as I can possibly have. And my group has a tendency to be able to drink quite a bit, especially if it’s free flowing.
So, if someone really wants to drink they can go to the bar and get something for themselves.
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