- 5 years ago
Anon account because of the nature of this thread. I am wondering what your views are on casual, no strings attached sex when you are single and in no kind of committment with anyone.
I am “newly” single. It’s not really new because my Fiance and I broke up 8 months ago but we were together for 7 years, and I guess sometimes I still don’t FEEL single and free to do what I want since I have been in a committed relationship my entire adult life until this point. That was not a healthy relationship. He was both emotionally and physically abusive and I was supressed and controlled. Over these last 8 months I have finally had the opportunity to begin to “find” myself.
Soon after the breakup I had a male acquaintance contact me and ask if we could get together sometime. He was obviously coming onto me and I wasn’t ready to get into any kind of relationship and wasn’t all that interested anyway, so I told him that it was too soon after my breakup. He understood, but kept contacting me every now and then nonetheless, and I kept turning him down.
He is a VERY open-minded and nonjudgemental person. Very laid-back which is appealing to me as I have been kind of uptight in the past. He eventually brought up the idea of no strings attached sex if I wasn’t interested in anything more, and if there’s a connection, great, and if not that’s fine too. Still, I shut him down for more than two months but finally had a very open conversation with him last night.
Let me finally get to the point. I am thinking about seeing him tonight. He proposed the idea and said it’s up to me. At this moment I am not interested in him at all for a relationship, but for sex, well maybe. I am curious and honestly believe that he would be a great lover. What I can’t seem to get past is the stigma of a woman sleeping with someone just for fun. I am extremely open-minded when it comes to sex and most things in life, and I believe that women should be able to express themselves sexually without fear of judgement…but we all know that’s not the case most of the time. I think that is the only thing holding me back…I have no fear of developing feelings for him at this time.
He wouldn’t be “using me” for sex any more than I am using him. And I don’t think that sharing an experience with someone has to be a bad thing just because there’s not love involved. However, this is new to me which is why I’m mulling over it here.
THOUGHTS? Terrible idea? Great idea? Fun? I need some fun in my life!