- 5 years ago
- Wedding: August 2014
Hearing my mother’s wedding story has always made me chuckle at the way she describes mishap after mishap with wide eyes accompanied by lots of head shaking and twice as many “Lord-help-us-all’s”. As nightmarish as it may seem (and I hope it doesn’t legitimately scare you!), it actually helped get me the right perspective on weddings. I thought maybe some of you who are deeper in the throwes of planning than I am could use the reminder, or atleast a laugh! 🙂
First of all, they accidentally scheduled the wedding the same time as our hometown’s high school sorority recognition program and formal, which is a big family event. So minus a chunk of the guest list. My dad’s dad got engaged and remarried a second time within 4 months of their wedding. So add the awkward situation of a new stepmom and having your wedding parade slightly rained on. Speaking of rain, it stormed on their Big Day and because the crowd of people waiting to sign the guest book had extended out the door of the small church lobby, the attendants finally closed the book and hustled everyone inside out of the downpour. So subtract another chunk of dear guests who went unrecorded at such a sentimental time! The Flower Girl and Ring Bearer did as kids do and were everywhere.. running back up the aisle, across her train, all over the altar, stomping on the hollow altar steps, etc. The BMs were responsible for taking their dress pattern to the seamstresses of their choice since they all lived so apart. The idea was black velvet, long sleeve, white lace collar. (Additional note: Mom’s mom had meddled with the Bridesmaid or Best Man list and guilted her into adding a family friend or two…) Half the seamstresses, however, botched the collars (botched = extended them down past the bust line), so all of them looked like “nuns with bibs.” –A direct quote from her priest. Actually the priest’s full quote was, “They look like nuns with bibs taking yard trimmings to the street!” This is in reference to the bouquets, which the florist designed to look like long bundles of branches, some of which extended to eye-level and bobbed over their shoulders while carried. On that floral note, Mom’s colors were blood red, dark green, and black for her Christmas wedding. Where did peach, orange, and pastel yellow roses fit in? We may never know, but those ended up in every centerpiece and on the cake. The florist admitted to buying these at the Kroger and ACTUALLY using his own yard trimmings for the bouquets. His crowning floral glory was a created by placing a chair on the food table and cascading his grocery store roses and branches down it. It was also a musicless reception, since their pianist (bless his heart) had a bad case of food poisoning and a sprained back and barely made it through the ceremony. Oh, and did I mention Mom’s very best friend in all the world was too sick/incapacitated to make the 6 hour drive? Added to the normal craziness (e.g. Dad vowed to “always BE upon her with love” instead of to “always LOOK upon her with love”) it was one logistic mess of a wedding!
And believe it or not, my mother, master of coordination, logistics and scheduling, loved her wedding. She still watches the wedding video all cuddled up to Dad on their anniversary and still gets teary, and still swears it was THE best day of her life. She is going to be the most calming wedding planning assistant ever! (And blessings upon my dear florist, Mom will be on her like stink on poo.)
So chins up, little bees! Shoes are just shoes, cake is just cake, crazy family is crazy family, and a wedding is nothing but a party. If you’re married to the love of your life at the end of the day, call it a success! Sure hope I stick to that mantra too… Now quit that stressing and let’s go get hitched! 🙂