Post # 1
Didn’t know where to post this so I chose Beehive lol. ANYWHO, I was wondering about your opinions on this..
My fiance and I were really quite efficient and set a date for the wedding within five minutes of being engaged. We want it on 4/24/14, because that will be our five-year anniversary of being together. That date has been “our anniversary” for the last four years. Call me crazy, but I don’t want some strange date to take it’s place. He asked me to be his girlfriend 4/24/09, asked me to marry him on 4/24/13, and we plan to keep our pattern. (plus, I think 04/24/14 is a cool date).
My dear mother. I love that woman. BUT, she has been pestering me about the wedding date…… it falls on a thursday. I see that as unfortunate, but hey, it’s not my fault, it’s the calendar’s! Also, it may sound harsh, but it will weed out those who don’t care from those that do. If you know a year ahead of time and can’t plan for it, you must not want to be there very badly.
My mom kinda gave up when I told her I’d compromise on the location and make easier for family to attend (aka not have it out in BFE), but I was wondering if anyone else had problems with their date? do you think a wedding should fall on a weekend? and has anyone else felt strange about dating anniversary vs wedding anniversary?
Post # 3
@HaleyBOOMS: Also, it may sound harsh, but it will weed out those who don’t care from those that do. If you know a year ahead of time and can’t plan for it, you must not want to be there very badly.
I think that is a pretty poor attitude to have. You are asking guests to come celebrate your day, and you don’t care that the date will make it extrememly difficult for most of your guests to attend? Even for a family member I would be pissed about a Thursday wedding.
Post # 4
I think you have a pretty poor attitude, as well. If you waited a year to get married, it’d be on a Friday. Something to consider.
If I absolutely was not willing to be flexible on a date and it fell during the week, i’d elope instead of have half a guest list that can’t attend. Then i’d have a reception at home on a weekend to celebrate.
Post # 5
Also, it may sound harsh, but it will weed out those who don’t care from those that do. If you know a year ahead of time and can’t plan for it, you must not want to be there very badly.
Nice theory, but not necessarily true. There are many people like myself, who work at jobs where only a certain number of people can be off on any one shift. It doesn’t matter how much I love you, if I can’t get the time off, I can’t attend.
There are also many people who have little or no paid vacation time and would have to take unpaid time off to attend the wedding and possible travel time as well. Are you going to make up the difference if they can’t make their rent that month?
You can schedule your wedding whenever you want, but please try to be a bit more understanding if people can’t make it.
Post # 6
@HaleyBOOMS: What type of wedding are you having? If you’re having an evening ceremony and low-key dinner reception, then a Thursday wedding is fine (just like attending an evening dinner party). If you’re having an all-day affair, that’s a whole different story (adults have work, kids have school, etc.).
ETA: What about having a civil ceremony (with dinner afterwards) on Thursday and the big reception/party on that same weekend?
Post # 7
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
@HaleyBOOMS: I don’t think it’s rude to your guests but you have to understand that many guests are going to send their regrets because they cannot attend a weekday wedding. I personally wouldn’t attend a weekday wedding for anyone except immediate family and extremely close friends and even then I might still decline if the wedding is not in the town where I live. A weekday wedding tells me that the bride wants an intimate wedding so she isn’t expecting a big crowd.
Post # 8
Honestly, I was with you. I didn’t want to pick some random day for our wedding date. Thankfully, our anniversary fell on a weekend. If it had not, I probably would have tried to find a day that did fall on a Saturday that was special to us. However, if all that had failed, I would’ve stuck with my anniversary day rather than pick some random date.
Post # 9
I think it’s pretty rude to pick a date knowing that it would inconvenience most of your guests. I live in an area with lots of traffic, so getting to an afternoon or evening wedding on a week day would take hours (no joke), plus having to take time off from work to get ready. You’d have to be a very close friend to get me to change my schedule around for a weekday wedding… and honestly, I might have a year to plan for it, but I will still be working, so I can’t change that fact.
Post # 10
Also depends on how big and how local your guest list is. If you’re having a 200 person affair where a lot of people are going to be driving an hour or more, a weeknight is pretty bad, but if you’re having something small with close friends and family, I could see pulling it off. Just realize that you’re already hearing about this and you’re at the beginning of the process, so it’s far from the last comment you’ll get!
Although vendors are usually cheaper on weeknights, so there’s that.
Post # 11
Saturdays are generally preferred as most people have the day off, People worry about having to leave work early on a weekday to make it to a wedding. People can and do get married on weekdays, just be aware, many guests will leave early because they have work the next day and some will simply decline to attend. I accept weekday wedding invitations but I leave by 9 PM at the latest.
Could you maybe elope privately on Thursday and then have your wedding on Saturday the 26th? That way you keep your special date but have a more convenient wedding time.
Post # 12
@Bostongrl25: @crayfish: I agree. I think it is pretty inconsiderate of you to have your wedding on a Thursday and you should expect to get alot of declines.
Post # 13
@HaleyBOOMS: i can understand why you want this date but i think it’s important to keep your guests’ convenience in mind.
why don’t you and your fi go to city hall on the 24th and get legally married and then have your full celebration on the saturday. you will still celebrate your anniversary on the 24th and your family and friends will most likely be able to attend your wedding celebration. it’s the best compromise for everyone.
Post # 14
I personally would not want to attend a wedding on a Thursday evening, but if I knew about it a year in advance, I’d suck it up and use my paid time off to attend depending on if it was far away from me. If the wedding isn’t close to some guests, you could be potentially making them take 2 days off if they have to travel. If I didn’t have PTO I wouldn’t take more than 1 day.
I like what PP said, why dont you elope than have a celebration with friends on the weekend? Or even have a small ceremony with just family on Thursday? Then saturday do a celebration?
Post # 15
@HaleyBOOMS: I have my wedding on a Thursday but will only have my very closest family and friends. Thats only ~23 people. Its almost like a destination wedding for them too because every single person will have to travel so they would be taking more than a few days off for the wedding no matter the day. If you expect more than 25 people to come, dont put it on an Thursday.
Post # 16
Unless you were my absolute closest family or friend would i attend a Thursday wedding. Sorry, you’re free to do what you like, im just tell you where I’m coming from.
Wait a year or two and then your date will be on a Friday or a Saturday.