(Closed) Caterer forgot about my wedding; showed up two hours late. Advice please!

posted 6 years ago in Recaps
Post # 3
13015 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Honestly, I would take his offer to comp the entire meal.  He didn’t forget the vegetable, he forgot to show up for your wedding.  For a caterer to forget is horrible business.  I personally wouldn’t pay a cent to a caterer who didn’t remember my wedding. 

It sounds like you had a good attitude about the entire thing – so kudos to you!  I would have been livid! 

Post # 4
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I think you should not pay anything. Thank him for his apology and ask that he do more in planning and proper coordination in the future to prevent the problem.

Post # 5
33 posts
  • Wedding: June 2012

This sounds terrible but it seems like you handled it pretty well!  Since this was completely the fault of the caterer, and they offered to pay for it all, I would just go with it and not pay!  Almost two hours late is ridiculous, even though some people got food, not all did.  Props to them for understanding it is their mistake and being willing to not charge you!


Post # 7
2416 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012


Seriously! I commend the fact that you want to pay something but they totally dropped the ball. I’m glad the food eventually made it, but it was after so much time, aggravation and anxiety on your part! It ruined the vision you had for your wedding in a big way even though things worked out alright.

You shouldn’t pay a dime. They don’t deserve it. How does that even happen?!

I’m glad it all worked out, but now it’s time for them to accept the consequences to their (lack) of actions. Don’t pay a dime. You spent so much time planning this special day so for them to do something like this is horrible.

Post # 8
1828 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

I think you should take the FULL refund. The added stress of walking down the aisle knowing that this was happening is enough to make up for it….consider it emotional damages!

Post # 9
1659 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

You might choose to give the servers or any staff a gratuity for the service that they eventually did provide, but if the manager has agreed to comp the event then it sounds like he is okay handbath that loss for his own bottom line.

Post # 10
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

@abbie017:  yup.


If he’s not fighting you on not paying anything, don’t offer to pay. That is a pretty unexusable mistake and certainly violates several items in your contract.

Post # 11
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I appreciate you desire to be fair and everything, but you should not have to pay! I would accept the restaurant’s apology and the comp.

Post # 12
5428 posts
Bee Keeper

I would actually talk to him face to face…. and ask how this could have hapened?

Post # 13
1359 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

You are a really good person to consider paying him even though he agreed to comp it. IF I were you, I might pay 1/3 still for the actual food. Subtract 1/3 for service, another 1/3 for display, and you have 1/3 left. Totally up to you though.

Post # 14
494 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

No, you definitely deserve a full refund.  Don’t try to convince yourself otherwise.

Post # 15
1043 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Agree with PPs.  I’m also uncomfortable with gracious offers, and I’m sure my first reaction to “Don’t pay anything” would be to feel bad.  However, this is a HUGE deal and completely unacceptable.  His entire business is to show up with food on time.  An hour and 45 minutes late is unreal.  I would have been livid.  

Take his offer, pay nothing, and use that money for something awesome.  You deserve it!

Post # 16
1158 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Don’t feel bad,that is a huge deal.Thank him for comping the food and don’t think twice about it.It will be a good lesson for him if he has to cater another wedding in the future.Sorry that happened to you.

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