(Closed) Catholic Ceremony Question

posted 11 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2009

Hi there!

I went to a wedding last year where the couple had gotten married at the church the day before and the priest did another "version"  at a country club on the actually wedding day. Not sure how this worked exactly, but it totally worked for them.I think this varies church to church and priest to priest.

You can have a ceremony at a church and reception at a different location. Its really not that uncommon these days. 

OK and to answer your question 😛 your parents dont need to catholic or married in the catholic church to get baptized, but you will need catholic sponsors or godparents who are. 

Post # 4
2640 posts
Sugar bee

Ok, first, if you want your reception iat the mansion, why not just havethe ceremony in the Church, and the reception at the mansion?  They might even have an outdoor cocktail hour that can give you some of the feel of an outdoor ceremony, if that’swhat you feel you are missing.

I think the requirement for baptizing your children is that you are going to raise the child in the faith.  For example, if you were single, you could baptize your child.  In that snese you wouldn’t have to wait until you found a man and got married to baptize your child.  also adults can certainly choose to be baptized and enter the Catholic faith.  But I think you might raise some eyebrows if you try to claim you will raise your children as Catholic but seem to have no problem with having a marriage that is not recognized by the Catholic Church.

Here’s the bigger question.  Why is having a ceremony at a mansion so important that you’d be willing to have the Catholic Church claim you as unmarried, but you still want your children baptized Catholic?  I could see if a priest looked at the facts and questioned your motives.  I think you might want to just look at your priorities.

I don’t know if I’m sizing this up correctly, but I’m getting the feeling you see this mansion and think the ceremony will be dreamier, more romantic, or whatever, compared to your Church (which might need some updating from the 70’s).   I can appreciate this, truly.  However, I think you need to think about what your marriage means to you.  To me, it’s more important to have my marriage valid, religiously.  And I think the Catholic Church is spot on.  It might make for a difficult decision, but it will make you think about what’s important.  Also, not all is lost.  The reception can still be at the mansion.

Good luck.

Post # 5
2470 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Please consider this post an echo of Tanya123’s post above.

Did you just mistype and meant to say you want to have your ceremony and the mansion you rented for your reception?

Post # 6
84 posts
Worker bee

Somehow my cousins are baptized in the catholic church (as am I but my parents were married in the church) and my aunt and uncle weren’t married in the church. I think some diocese/individual churches are more/less strict about this. 

Post # 7
2207 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

Some churches are more strict about this than others.  An option to explore is to get a catholic priest to bless the marriage after the ceremony.  We are getting married in a Presbyterian church, but FH and I are both Roman Catholic (we are marrying here for various reasons, nothing at all against the Catholic church) but it was important to us that our marriage be recognized.  My dad did some asking around, and my priest will bless our marriage after the fact.

As for the children, you will absolutely be able to have them baptized and brought up Catholic.  I am my nieces godmother, and for the baptism, one set of either the Godmother or Godfather had to show proof that thye were memebers at a Catholic Church – the other didnt.  some require both to be, some require neither.  good luck!

Post # 8
12 posts
  • Wedding: November 2009

I think it really depends on the Priest, the church and the diocese.  For examply, my Priest and church wouldn’t do a Sunday wedding but others would. If my understanding is correct, you could getting married outside the church by someone else. Then at a later date, you could be blessed or have the ceremony again with the priest in order for it to count as a sacrament and christian marriage in the Catholic church. That’s what our priest told us. As far as being able to have children baptized, that shouldn’t matter at all.

Good luck!

Post # 9
374 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

My parents were not married in a Catholic Church. My brothers and I were all baptized and raised as Catholics- however my mother could not receive holy communion for a number of years until their marriage was fully accnowledge by the church. I can get more information from here, but thats all I remember as a child growing up!

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