(Closed) Catholic ceremony – what did you do to make it “unique”?

posted 8 years ago in Catholic
Post # 3
Member
1897 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

We are having another pastor (non catholic) come up and do a hand blessing!

 

Post # 3
Member
1897 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

double.

 

Post # 3
Member
1897 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

wow, triple post?  sorry!

 

Post # 4
Member
2820 posts
Sugar bee

We wrote our own vows and wrote and read the prayer of the faithful.  My husband’s side of the family speak a diff language (though most also know english) so I read in english and then he read in french.

Post # 7
Member
1580 posts
Bumble bee

One thing to consider- if many of your guests aren’t Catholic or haven’t been to many weddings, the traditional Catholic marriage ceremony will seem very unique to them.

We will be including some personal things in the intentions. The priest will hopefully give a good homily.

Maybe you could put extra information in the program for guests to read before the ceremony.

Post # 8
Member
2820 posts
Sugar bee

I’m not sure how it works but the priest who wed us encouraged us to write our own vows and the prayer of the faithful.  However, he still officiated the exchange of rings so that might be how we got around it because reading on the catholic wedding sites it says they usually don’t allow it.

Post # 10
Member
1025 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We’re having our wedding party write our prayers of the faithful and reading them ourselves. Also we’re having both sets of parents walk us down the aisle. I’m kinda relieved not to have to plan an entire ceremony, to be honest. I know it’ll be nice no matter what!

Post # 11
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

We had a Latin Mass.  It gave us no choice of the readings, but very much expressed who we are.  It also took a lot of the stress of off trying to personalize it.

Post # 12
Member
13 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2010

We went to our first wedding as a couple 6 weeks after starting to date.  We have since been to about 5 Catholic weddings together.  We have sorta been taking notes of what we liked and what we didn’t like from day 1!  Music is definitely the way we will “express” ourselves for the Mass. We LOVE Irish music (and we both loved it prior to meeting each other).  We are having traditional Irish musicians perform during the Mass. Our church in Chicago frequently uses 3-4 songs that have “catholic” lyrics and are set to traditional Celtic songs.  Luckily the lyrics fit, too! Also luckily, the music director at the church we are getting married in and the priest that is marrying us are completely excited about our music choices! 

I always wanted the servant song for the Communion Song-  but everyone I know has used it in the past five years.  Instead we are using “When this day is done” by Liam Lawton.

Our pre-cana priest suggested that we make the day about us- and not about that first look of me walking down the aisle.   He suggested that we take pictures before (it’s a Friday evening wedding) and that we greet guests as they come into the church.   He said that way we can enjoy every minute of the Sacrament, rather than get nervous “waiting” to see each other.  We are definitely doing pictures before, and may greet people.  We talked about a non-traditional processional,  but both of our mothers were against that (even though his parents walked in together 35 years ago!)   We are still working those details out.

 

Post # 13
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I wasn’t nervious at all walking down the aisle with my Dad and it certainly didn’t take the focus off the Mass.  Granted, I suppose I can see that with a Catholic Mass in the ordinary form, that could get distracting because you’re coming down the aisle just to meet the groom, but then you go straight to the pew as Mass begins.  In the Traditional Latin Mass, the vows are before Mass.

Here’s how it worked for us, and some of these decisions I made last minute.  I had the best man (my brother) walk my mom down the aisle.  He then took his spot up front.  I had my husband walk his mom down the aisle with his dad following and then he took his spot.  I had the bridesmaids and groomsmen walk down, genuflect and go straight to the pews, followed by the ring bear and flower girl.   I then had our lone usher (he was originally a groomsmen, but I lost a bridesmaid) walk my maid of honor down.  I also did this as the usher and the maid of honor were getting married two months after my wedding.  They genuflected and she went to her place and he went to the pew.  Then my dad and I went down. 

In the traditional Mass, the bride and the groom then kneel at the altar rail while they wait for the priest and servers.  My church didn’t have an altar rail so we had portable kneelers in front.  So we knelt and prayed as our maid of honor and best man stood beside us.  I wanted only them up front with the priest because I wanted to emphasis that they, with the priest are the official witnesses to the validity of our marriage.  The other bridesmaids, groomsmen and even the guests are non-essential, but those three were essential. 

While it wasn’t planned, the sunlight from the sky light ended up shinning directly on the back of my veil.  I heard the gasp from our guests and people kept commenting about it at the reception asking if I had planned that, but I had no idea what they were talking about till I saw pictures.

Then the priest and the servers came out.  We gave our consent to marry while kneeling.  The priest thought we were supposed to kneel while saying our vows in the old rite because it didn’t specify anything in the missal, but after some discussion we decided to stand to say our vows and to exchange rings.  We then went to the pews and the priest instructed all the guests to pray for us as he prepared for Mass.

So for about 3 minutes (which is a long time for guests), everyone sat in their pews with nothing to do but pray.  Then the Latin Mass began and everyone tried to follow me as to when to sit, stand or kneel, but I got confused because I’m used to going to high masses and because while I had started to feel I internally knew when to sit, stand or kneel at a Latin Mass, I wasn’t quite sure.  Meanwhile the booklet kept referring to “stand for high mass” and I’m like “This is a low Mass so I guess I ignore this instruction.”  So I ended up kneeling forever!

We processed out and the bridal party went straight to the bridal room to not confuse guests as we were not having a receiving line. 

The reception began immediately in the community center.  No one even had to go outside for it.  Ultimately the entire reception was done before the 4pm Mass.  I had expected it to go on till 6, but everyone was danced out by 4 and some guests had left by 3:30 which was fine with me because I got the DJ for free.  I would have been really upset had I paid for the DJ.

Post # 14
Member
411 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

We’re definitely outlining the whole mass in our programs. While most of the people in our area are Catholic, there are 4 or 5 people in our bridal party (that totals 12) that have never even been IN a Catholic church. We’re going to put little blurbs in the programs about traditions of the church and such too, as well as a history of our church (it was built in 1874).

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