Post # 1
My fiance and I are both Catholic and are getting married in the Catholic church I grew up in. I want to know if anyone can give us some advice on what to expect when we meet the priest, what are they going to ask, what do we need to say, etc. We are meeting with him next week! Thanks in advance!!
Post # 3
@love2wearpolo: It’s no big deal. They’re going to ask if you’ve been baptised, and confirmed in the Church. They will also ask if you are cohabiting, if you are being coerced, if you’ve been pressured by anyone, if you are, or have been married before… it’s really noothing to worry about. If you’re living together, you can still get married, but they usually won’t do a mass – all tat means is the Rite of Eucharist is removed from the ceremony, and you just have a Liturgy of the Word (mass without consecration and eucharist). That questionnaire is called “Form 1” and is a quick interview, for each of you, by yourself with the priest. They don’t ask sex questions.
He will have to have the parish where he was baptised send his baptismal certificate – this is about preventing bigamy, essentially, which is why it has to be sent from the parish. Just a matter of your Fiance making a phone call or an email; no big deal at all.
A parent, grandparent, or someone who has known you for a long time, needs to go into your, or their, parish and fill out “Form 2.” It’s the same as “Form 1” but basically just someone who knows you confirming it. Those people don’t have to be Catholic.
Then you’ve got to do the pre-marriage course – the priest will fill out a registration form for you at your first meeting/interview, and then you just call whomever is hosting the one you want to attend, and make sure there is room, and then you just show up the first night. Ours cost $160; it’s usually 7 weeknight evenings, or concentrated into a couple f weekends. Also easy, and all you are requred to do is attend every session. If you miss a session, you can make it up at a different course. We had to do that with Session 1. When you’re done the course, they send your completion certificate to the parish where you’re gettng married.
The whole thing is, honestly, super duper easy and stress free. Nothing to worry about at all.
Post # 4
Ours wasn’t exactly like pp, but I hear the Detroit Diocese does things a little different.
everything was the same up until the “form 2” part. We didn’t have a “form 2” for someone else to fill out.
As far as classes, We had to take one 6 hour “pre-marriage seminar” class ($80) and one basic class on NFP ($30ish) that was about 2 hours. We also had to take the FOCCUS test ($15). Once we took that (online) we met with our Deacon (ours took 3 meetings of about an hour each) to go over our differing answers and discuss anything else we had questions on.
Next we will meet with our priest to go over our mass selections (readings, prayers of the faithful, etc) and we will also have a meeting with our music director to discuss music for our ceremony.
It all was way easy and a lot less stressful than i was anticipating! Good luck!
Post # 5
@love2wearpolo: We fiance and I are both Catholic and were raised in pretty Catholic families. We are getting married at a Catholic church on the university campus where we met, but I wanted our presider to be the priest from my hometown parish – the same one who baptized me, did my first communion, etc.
Now, my fiance and I are not perfect Catholics. We go to church, pray together… but we also live together (a tough decision that we made after 5 years of dating). I reached out to my hometown priest after we got engaged and we had a quick phone conversation. It was a little strange, since I didn’t know what to expect either (would he agree to marry us on the spot, would he want to meet, etc)! One thing my fiance and I agreed we would do is be upfront with the priest about our living situation, so I told our priest about it on the phone. He didn’t say “yes/no I will or won’t marry you” but we arranged a time to meet in person.
My fiance and I ended up going to mass at the priest’s church and afterwards he invited us to his office and we had a nice 30-45 minute chat. He asked us questions mainly about our families (are you close to your parents, are they happily married, siblings, and more). He asked us about school since we are both MBA students. We talked about marriage prep, and what we can do as a couple to prepare for the sacrament. He gave us a brochure or two and recommended a few couples in his parish that offer classes on NFP. He also asked us to think about going on a “retreat” and spend some time apart before we get married. I need to ask him about this more when we meet him again…
It didn’t feel like we were being quizzed, and it didn’t feel like a Q&A session. I was SUPER nervous and now that it’s over, there was nothing to be nervous about.
We did not talk $$ or his fee when we first met either. We plan on taking the priest out to dinner/getting coffee a few times now and between the wedding too. It will help him get to know us more and make for a better homily at our wedding mass!
There is Catholic prep you’ll need to do including a pre-marriage inventory, a retreat, and the FOCCUS or PREPARE questionnaire. You should learn more about this requirements from your wedding coordinator at the church.
Don’t stress, and good luck!