Post # 1
When we met with our priest this week he told us the church will be $200, the organist will be $125, and the only additional charge would be to pay him whatever we felt was appropriate. I don’t want to be insulting but I don’t want to pay him more than we have to, so how much is appropriate to pay him for performing our ceremony?
Post # 3
Well, do you have a lay person minister who does marriage prep and/or related paper work in your church? he/she should give you a good ballpark.
If circumstances permitting, I would pay at least $100.
Post # 4
I’ve heard again and again that the suggested priest donation is from $150-$200 at least from here on the bee and within my area.
Post # 5
I do think it depends on the area of the country. I do agree with pren79 in that you could ask someone or call the rectory and speak with the assistant, they should know or offer help
— you could also ask the priest too in a polite manner as I did (“Father, is there a suggested or appropriate honorarium?”).
I would say that if the organist is $125, you should think about giving the priest more than that.
And remember, because it is a gift to the priest (religious offering) you can deduct it from your taxes.
Post # 6
We’re doing $100, but we’re in a small town. I’d say $150-200 is appropriate, but I can almost guarantee he’s probably recieved much less and much more than that. Look at it this way — he’s the person who will be truly making your marriage valid. What’s it worth??
Post # 7
We’re giving $150. I’m interested to hear what others have to say, because ours was a total guess, as well!
Post # 8
We hadn’t decided yet – we still have a bit 🙂
I just want to throw out there in regards to Appleblossom‘s comment, that the couple actually gives the sacrament to each other…. not the priest conferring it on you… 🙂
Post # 9
I wondered this as well – but we received a little folder of info from our church and luckily it says that the typical gift amount is $50-$100.
Post # 10
We’re not being asked to pay a cent for our wedding, so we’re donating $200 to the church and $100 to our priest (a friend of FI) and $50 to the priest who’s doing our pre-marital counseling.
Post # 11
Wow, you guys are lucky. For some reason to get married at our church it was $860 total. That includes priest fee, altar boys, pre-marital class, organist, and whatever else. It was considered “financial obligation.” We were shocked to say the least, but its a beautiful church.
Post # 12
I had to pay two churches because I had to take pre-cana classes in one state and a “donation” to the church where I was getting married.
For the actual priest who was marrying us, I had to donate $150.
But the pre cana classes cost me $200.
For the alter servers, we gave them $15 each.
For the organist, it was $150.
For the soloist, it was $150.
Both of which were near big cities… Seattle and Philadelphia. I don’t know if that makes a difference on how expensive things are.
Post # 13
Hmm. I’m wondering if the donation to the priest is tax deductible since it’s really a personal gift? I’d check with your tax person on the priest gift. I know donations for the wedding to the church are deductible. ANy CPa’s care to chime in?
Post # 14
$600 for our church (up $200 from the previous year). I’m not sure how to even address additional donations but another large church in downtown Milwaukee costs $750.
Post # 15
I’ve always heard to get married in a church was just a donation of like $200 or so. Learning is was $860 was shocking and def. took a hit on our budget. Our church is in Cleveland, OH and not even in the Downtown area. I thought it was ironic though that the priest made a comment about how expensive weddings are?! Yeah, ya think?
Post # 16
$500 to reserve the church, $150 as a donation to the priest (I just checked with our music director who says this is sort of the going rate in our area), $350 for the music director/organist, $250 for the cantor, $250 for a trumpeter, $50 for an altar server and ~$300 for our engaged encounter weekend. And that does not even count the cost of decorating the church! It’s definitely expensive but I think it will be totally worth it =)