Cats in the house

posted 2 weeks ago in Relationships
Post # 76
Member
694 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I’m always wary of bees who make one post and then we never hear from them again.

Post # 77
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee

If he’s always had cats agreeing to not get anymore is huge. 

I hate how empty my home feels when there’s no cats. It’s awful. I’d leave before agreeing to that. 

It doesn’t sound like either of you have tried to minimize allergies so that might be something to look into. 

Though honestly, I don’t think you should continue this relationship. Are you really going to be happy that way? Will he forgive you if he does rehome his cats? 

Something for you to keep in mind is that a majority of cats that enter a animal shelter never leave.

Even if you find a home or a no-kill rescue you’ve still doomed 2 other cats that may have found homes. There are consequences to rehoming. 

Post # 78
Member
95 posts
Worker bee

I’m not sure who this friend of yours is who said “if he loved you, he’d get rid of the cat” but that is terrible advice!

You might think this is about how much he loves you, but it’s not about that at all… “pet owner” is part of who he is as a person. I love animals, so if someone asked me to give up my animals, it would be like giving up a part of myself.

Furthermore, animals and their owners bond to each other. It’s a significant relationship, just like friends or family members. Making him give them up would cause grief and sadness for both him and the cats. I can’t think that you would want to do that when it seems like there are workable solutions. Even the fact that he has agreed not to get any more cats after they die is a big concession on his part… I’m not sure I could do that.

I have a cat who has been my best friend for 11 years. I’d be too heartbroken to give her up if an SO asked me. I’m an animal person, and that is who they are dating. That said, I’m willing to make compromises, like not allowing her to sleep on the bed or in the cupboards with the clothes and linen etc.

Post # 79
Member
89 posts
Worker bee

Okkkk you are being quite rude. You say he’s not considering your feelings but have you considered his? My partner and I have 2 cats. He has a mild allergy to cats but that didn’t stop him from growing up with cats or adopting cats with me. I would never, in a million years, make my partner get rid of the cats or be with someone who wanted me to get rid of my cats. No way. They are my babies. You’re being selfish and unreasonable. 

Post # 80
Member
1456 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2006

Bunnyang :  Yes! I’m not completely natural/healthy/organic by any means. Like at all. lol. But…I don’t take medicine unless I have to. I have to be miserable to take Aleve. I don’t take any daily medications and would heavily weigh the pros and cons if I were prescribed something. I used to take Benadryl as a sleep aide because back in the day my grandmas doctor told her that was the safest option along with a couple extra strength Tylenol. Now studies are showing that’s not the case. My grandpa had Parkinson’s and I had to watch him die from the effects of a drug trial gone wrong. Now that they’ve uncovered all these screw ups with the FDA, I don’t trust much anymore. 

Post # 81
Member
8764 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

catskillsinjune :  

They were a handful!  And since you know GSDs, you get that having five is totally different than being able to let all five out together at the same time.  Labs, they’re not.  They had their divisions and alliances.

When I brought my beloved girl over from Amsterdam, one of my other girls, who normally loved any and all other dogs, developed an immediate and irrational hatred of the new girl.

I suppose it all balances out, one of my boys fell hopelessly in love with the new girl.

Those were fun times.  I could go on all day.  Many years later and living in the burbs, we have three now.  Two are best buds, one outlier.  In the world of GSDs, that’s pretty good.

Post # 82
Member
3274 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

sassy411 :  oh man, i can only imagine! it’s like having a house full of middle schoolers 😂 i just had one GSD…but man, her discriminatory powers when it came to other fur friends was something else. she HATED our cat (long story – cat came into the house after she did) and for years we thought she hated all cats – turns out she was secretly friends with the neighbor’s cat next door. would go up on their deck, wait for kitty to come out, and they would go on adventures together. this went on for YEARS without us knowing (we only know because the neighbors mentioned it one day and we were like…huh?) but she wanted nothing to do with any of the dogs on either side of us (her ability to totally ignore and stonewall them was extrordinary. you’d have no idea dogs were barking at her like mad). but then there were a couple of dogs she just LOVED that she’d be so happy to see every once in a while. go figure. ok, i’ll stop now – you’re right, i could go on for days.

Post # 83
Member
402 posts
Helper bee

sarang :  i would dump you and keep my cats  in MY house 

Post # 84
Member
736 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

sassy411 :  

I had four husky/GSD mixes growing up, and the dynamics between them were fascinating.  They were all one litter, so there was no breed imbalance; two of each just looked and acted more like each kind of dog.

The more huskiesque pair were rebels, smart as hell and constantly testing boundaries and trying to take on authority in the pack.  While the GSDoggier pair were just as smart but showed it by playing teacher’s pets a lot.  They would make a point of obeying immediately and then looking with disappointment at their naughty sibs.  I remember trying to coax the huskier ones out of a swimming pond on a hot day so we could go home.  While they gleefully ignored me, fully aware that I wasn’t going in that gungy water to try to drag them out.  The shepherder ones sat on either side of me with these expressions on their face like “Ugh – they are SUCH children.  But look how good WE are!”

Post # 85
Member
10 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2019

some people are getting too attached to their pets and that’s why it isn’t that easy to get rid of it

Post # 87
Member
8764 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

sunburn :  

What the hell does that even mean?  ‘Too attached’ to a beloved pet?  How is that possible.

I will, however, submit that not all humans are worthy of pets.

Post # 88
Member
131 posts
Blushing bee

sarang :  If you and your daughter are both allergic, the cats absolutely need to go. I don’t like cats either, but I love dogs. BUT if my boyfriend was allergic to dogs, then the dog would go. This is just my opinion, of course. But also, I want to add, I have never had a pet I am super attached to. So, in that case, if I had I’m sure I would feel differently. 

Post # 89
Member
779 posts
Busy bee

sassy411 :  I was commenting on the post just above mine which said:

[Quote]some people are getting too attached to their pets and that’s why it isn’t that easy to get rid of it[/quote]

. “Too attached” was the term she used. For myself, I like animals much more than people.

Post # 90
Member
8764 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

sunburn :  

I’m sorry.  I was actually agreeing with you, but that must not have been clear.  My apologies.

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